Wizards of the Lost Kingdom

source: Wizards of the Lost Kingdom

What we have here is a downright brilliant piece of early 80's incompetence that will render even the biggest connoisseur of trash- cinema completely speechless! "Wizards of the Lost Kingdom" is a very cheap and cheesy fantasy/Sword-and-Sorcery adventure that doesn't have an actual plot but does eagerly & shamelessly borrows elements from other films. Writer Ed Naha and Hector Olivera (who?) watched enough similar type of movies to know that they needed a handful of essential characters, but probably figured that all the rest would follow automatically. In order to make a fantasy-adventure you need: one super- evil villain (preferably with a black cape), one young hero in training, one lone warrior, one amiable type of furry pet, one wise midget living in the woods (optional) and a whole colorful collection of hideous demons, enslaved dwarfs, and winged gargoyles to serve as filler. The story is phenomenal and so original, with Simon the young son of a wizard having to flee from his beloved kingdom after the evil magician Shurka takes over the power and killed the king. Simon wants to go back and save the people, but therefore he needs his powerful ring which he lost during his escape. Simon befriends lone warrior Kor (the usually cool dude Bo Svenson who clearly needed the pay check), who assists Simon during the long and devastating journey full of ordeals, dangerous encounters and magical showdowns. Admittedly it doesn't even sound too bad thus far, but that's merely just because I excluded all the deliciously inept little details. Simon has a best friend named Gulfax, for example. Gulfax is an albino version of Chewbacca and evokes incontrollable chuckles whenever he opens his poodle-snout to yelp something incomprehensible. The obstacles during journey back home are hilariously irrelevant to the "plot" and simply serve as padding footage to cover up the lack of actual content. Simon has nightmarish visions inside the tent of a suspicious forest nymph, Kor settles an old score with the pig-faced nemesis whose sister he refused to marry and there's the supposedly horrible 'suicide cave' where you can only sing your way out of. But the absolute most unequally brilliant sequence – not just of this film alone but in the history of cinema – involves the resurrection of four zombie warriors. Simon awakes the legendary courageous warriors, hoping they will assist them in their battle, but the rotting corpses only take a few steps, complain about how tired they are and return back to their graves. That's it! So much for the zombie sub plot! Best sequence ever! I could go on listing unintentionally hilarious little details for several more paragraphs, but you get the idea. "Wizards of the Lost Kingdom" is a tremendously messed-up "so-bad-it's-good" film. Word of advice: do not watch this joyful piece of junk alone. Invite friends, preferably the dope-headed types with a wicked sense of humor, and watch it in group. It will be a night to remember

According to the page for this swords-and-sorcery disaster, Warriors of the Lost Kingdom was originally made in Argentina. That comes as no real surprise to me, since half of the dialogue doesn't even try to match up with the actors' lip movements. So what else can be said about a movie that everyone else in the world has already mentioned? Well, I guess I'll start off by explaining how I came about this movie. In all fairness, I would have never recognized the title if it had not been for the hilarious review on the Jabootu bad movie Web site. So while scowering the Family section of my local Star Trax video (a B-movie fan's paradise, as I quickly found out), I immediately knew the movie by its title and pictures on the back. Of course, the video cover tries in vain to make this look much more interesting than it actually is, so I weep for the poor kids who rented this wanting a good time. Sorry boys and girls, but this is one stinky Argentinian film that no one could enjoy outside of the camp value. And believe me, this thing has tons of camp. As my friend and I threw comments at the screen, there were numerous moments where our jaws just dropped. That sequed into out and out laughter, as certain elements are simply ridiculous. For example, the "big name actor" here is BO SVENSON. Who, you may ask? Who indeed! He's the only one whose voice isn't dubbed, and he has a thick country accent in a medeival time setting! Of course, nobody else here knows what period of history they're in, either. The villain looks like a pharoah, his minions are Skittle-colored midgets, ninjas, and Arabian nights, and his woman is half mermaid/swamp thing! I'm not going to go into anymore specifics, because this is honestly something you have to experience fresh. So if you're like me and happen to stumble upon this turd, be sure to pick it up if you're in the mood for some insanely bad fun. Truth be told, if Mike and the bots were still around, Wizards of the Lost Kingdom would be a great subject for them to study. 0/4 stars

This movie is horrible- in a 'so bad it's good' kind of way. The storyline is rehashed from so many other films of this kind, that I'm not going to even bother describing it. It's a sword/sorcery picture, has a kid hoping to realize how important he is in this world, has a "nomadic" adventurer, an evil aide/sorcerer, a princess, a hairy creature....you get the point. The first time I caught this movie was during a very harsh winter. I don't know why I decided to continue watching it for an extra five minutes before turning the channel, but when I caught site of Gulfax, I decided to stay and watch it until the end. Gulfax is a white, furry creature akin to Chewbacca, but not nearly as useful or entertaining to watch. He looks like someone glued a bunch of white shag carpeting together and forced the actor to wear it. There are scenes where it looks like the actor cannot move within, or that he's almost falling over. Although he isn't in the movie that much, the few scenes are worth it! Watch as he attempts to talk smack to Bo Svenson, taking the Solo-Chewbacca comparison's to an even higher level! I actually bought this movie just because of that character, and still have it somewhere! Gulfax may look like sh!t, but he made this movie!!! The only reason I've never seen the sequel, or even sought it out, was because of his absence! Perhaps should there be a final film, completing the trilogy, Gulfax will make a much-anticipated return!

Standard disclosure: I watched Wizards of the Lost Kingdom courtesy of the new MST3K. I've always prided myself in my ability to separate the movie from the show to give my honest opinion. A movie isn't necessarily bad just because it appeared on MST3K. With all that being said, however, I can honestly say the Wizards of the Lost Kingdom is one steaming pile of monkey poo. The movie tells the story of Simon – a sort of wizard-in-training. Simon's father was killed by the evil Shurka when he took over the kingdom. Simon was sent away for his own protection. Now, Simon, a creature that resembles a commode rug, a garden gnome, and an uninterested, out- of-shape Bo Svenson set off to right the wrongs of Shurka. I could write so much about Wizards of the Lost Kingdom, but really, what's the point. The movie is so juvenile, so inept, and so plain old bad that it's not worth the trouble. I suppose if you were under 8 years-old, you might find a little to enjoy. Everything about the movie – acting, special effects, costuming, stunts, humor, lighting, plot, direction, sets, locations – is bottom of the barrel. For the most part, I really didn't care about anyone on screen and whether they lived or died. It's all just so pathetic. I haven't rated the movie a "1" for two reasons. First, I have a soft spot for Bo Svenson. He's not the best, most charismatic actor you'll see, but he's made some movies I really enjoy (Inglorious Bastards, for example). And two, there's something about the way Thom Christopher plays a bad guy – or more accurately, overplays a bad guy – that I can't help but enjoy. While he's not as over-the- top as Shurka he was as Troxartes in Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell, he comes close. I'm not going to say it's a "good" performance, just fun to watch.

If somebody wants to make a really, REALLY bad movie, "Wizards of the Lost Kingdom" really sets a yardstick by which to measure the depth of badness. Start with the pseudo-Chewbacca that follows around the main character ... Some poor schmuck in a baggy white "furry" costume that looks as if it was stitched together from discarded pieces of carpeting. Work your way slowly, painfully, through more not-so-special effects that thoroughly deny the viewer from suspension of disbelief. Add a garden gnome (just for the heck of it). On second thought, skip this movie entirely and find something else to do for an hour and a half.

I have to start by telling you how I came across this movie.It was winter time in Alaska around the year 1990.A friend of mine from Australia was staying with me and my girl friend in a shoe box of an apartment.Winters in Alaska can be a bit brutal and most people stay indoors,drink heavily and watch anything that comes on the television.I had found this movie outside of a thrift store laying in a snowbank and right away new it was a treasure.It is quite possibly the best worst movie ever.We spent the next two weeks watching this movie and drinking like fish.We watched it so many times in fact that we would sometimes turn the television on its side or upside down for a more full filling effect.It is a true gem.The laughs will come nonstop and the memories last forever.If you see this movie for rent in a video store,steal it.You won't regret it!

Although i am inclined to agree with the other comments made by people who have seen this movie, i am ashamed to say i rather like it. Not often can such a huge pile of 80s pap be found outside of a Wham! video, so it is most definitely worth a viewing (£0.79 a night in my local store!). Watch out for the insanely obvious seams and zip on the monster's costume, the fact that the 'hero' looks a lot like Keith Chegwin and such classic lines as the following: Evil Wizard-Type Bloke: "At last we meet Kor..." Kor: "Thrilling, isn't it?" Amazing!!I also like the fact that although the video box looks quite exciting with images of a castle surrounded by raging seas and a dangerous falcon-like bird carrying a handsome hero to safety (among other such 'interesting and engaging' suggestions of what goes on in the actual film, none of them actually happen. No, I'm not joking...there really isn't a raging sea or a ferocious bird, it's just trying to make you interested...classic in my opinion. This film gets 10 for pure entertainment value!!

Genuinely jaw-droppingly bad. I disagree with the 'it's so bad that it's good' reviews. This film gets to that perplexing level of meaning dissonance, but just keeps going, exploring unchartered depths of bad film making.

this got it all, or lacks what every you put it.. very bad acting, very bad costumes, very bad settings, lousy effects, but, still this movie is a perfect example of a movie that is so horribly bad that its awesome.. i bought this on vhs 3 years ago in a fleamarket among 20 other movies didnt even reflect over this movie i just wanted a terence hill movie and got all tapes dirt cheap if i bought em all... put this in the vhs, i got a thing for 80ies fantasy movies... this is the only movie i saw, then directly afterwards looked on again, and the day after looked on again... that should tell you something about how cool this movie is... i enjoyed it totally..