Two If by Sea

source: Two If by Sea

The stage curtains open ... Although "Two If By Sea" isn't one of Sandra Bullock's best films, it has a quiet and undeniable charm. It knows how to balance the plot with characterization and keeps you entertained. Frank (Leary) and Roz (Bullock) are two people you grow to care about and want to see the best outcome for. This is a great little film and well worth the watch. The story starts right in the middle of things with no build up or foundation. Just two people - on the road - with a stolen valuable painting - police hot on their tail - on their way to a meeting with a buyer which equals payday for their efforts. They are also a couple, with their own history and share of problems and personality conflicts - and after 7 years of being together, things have finally come to a head. With the FBI, local police, a flattering neighbor, wise guys, and an obnoxious teenage kid all involved - you are taken down a sometimes comical path to a fun ending. I saw this one once over 20 years ago, and I remember liking it. I've been in a retro mood lately, so I decided to pop it in and give it another view and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Probably more this time than the last. There is an honesty and carefree quality to both of these characters that is appealing. The ability to seemingly be in the moment with their fair share of pressure and concerns, and yet not take everything too seriously. In fact, it almost radiates a kind of innocence, even though he is a petty thief who she is trying to straighten out. This one comes with a recommend. I was surprised how much I liked this movie, after all these years. It is a bit dated, but not too much. The chemistry between Leary and Bullock really works well here - almost like these two were made for each other. This is a fun diversion - a great way to spend 96 minutes.

This movie´s characters and performances makes me wanna quote star/co-writer Doctor Denis Leary himself in "No Cure For Cancer": "SHUT THE F*** UP!" I like Denis Leary´s stand-up act - he´s turned in some quite good performances in other movies (like "The Ref"). Here he´s just obnoxious. I like Sandra Bullock, but she´s made some pretty bad career choices in the nineties. This is one of them. I like Yaphet Kotto, but this part is just a badly written reworking of his sarcastic FBI officer in "Midnight Run". Naming him O´Malley was pretty funny, though. *½ (of ****)

Oh, dear. What a mess this movie is. When they are doing their thing, I like Leary and Bullock, but what is the deal with this movie? It has approximately the same intricate, original plot structure and nuanced character development as an average episode of "Top Cat" Don't get me wrong. I love "Top Cat", but not for two hours with live actors.

Every bad film that flops always has a title change, nine out of ten times, and such is the case with TWO IF BY SEA, a.k.a. STOLEN HEARTS. It's not an awful film by any means, semi-entertaining as a sweet, romantic crime romp -- but it's also nothing special, and certainly not worth renting when you can just wait for it to come on television. The underrated Denis Leary and overrated Sandra Bullock are two crooks-turned-lovers who are on the flee from their last job when they accidentally assume the identity of another couple in a local neighborhood. Yeah, it doesn't make any sense and defies logic. What were you expecting? 2.5/5

TWO IF BY SEA, in my opinion, is a charming romantic comedy about two lovers on the lam that'll make you laugh and smile from start to finish. If you ask me, Frank (Denis Leary) and Roz (Sandra Bullock) made an absolutely cute couple. I just don't understand why Frank felt he had to pull off that one last job before making amends with Roz. However, when she impersonated Homer Simpson, I laughed really hard. Someday, I'd like to go to somewhere in New England for a vacation. Before I wrap this up, I'd like to say that the production design was nice, the costumes were perfectly designed, and the performances were great. Now, in conclusion, I highly recommend this romantic comedy about two lovers on the lam that'll make you laugh and smile from start to finish to any Denis Leary or Sandra Bullock fan who hasn't seen it.

This film is the rightful butt of every bad-movie joke ever told. One of the worst and weakest of all films, it fails in ways beyond comprehension. Few movies have been any less funny or less emotionally involving for an unfortunate audience. At least with, say, Showgirls or Wild Wild West, you have something so bad it's funny. Two If By Sea does not have so lucky an audience. It's the worst kind of bad film, one that doesn't even have the decency to be humorously bad, so profoundly bad you can laugh at it. It is far, far worse. This movie makes Mortal Kombat Annihilation look like L.A. Confidential. I'm certain that watching Two If By Sea is considered torture in some parts of the world.

source: Two If by Sea

It hit me while watching this that the movie would have been better if Sandra Bullock and Dennis Leary were not criminals. I know, strange, as that is the whole basis for plot, but the two of them were such fun when they were bantering that I thought the plot just got in the way. If it would have been about the two of them sneaking up to Martha's Vineyard to rekindle their romance, this would have been a truly great film.

This movie started out with some good laughs but why didn't I like it? Sandra was pretty funny but that didn't satisfy me this time. The story itself was goofy. I mean this couple was together for seven years and had nothing? Beano didn't exactly come off as a real big crime boss. I mean being the idiot of the Red Green show to king pin? I don't think so. The fishing scene was hilarious and the deer scene was great. I didn't care for Roz making a play for the rich neighbor only to run back to Frank when rich boy gets busted. The FBI, police and sheriff department were all so inept it was like the key stone cops. It had all in all some laughs but I was glad when it ended. Good enough to watch once I guess. This movie is so so.