The Whole Ten Yards

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source: The Whole Ten Yards

Even though I have today off from work, I can't work outside because it's been pouring down rain for two days in a row. So, I thought, "Why not go see The Whole Ten Yards? I liked The Whole Nine Yards. Yeah, I know. A sequel is frequently not as good as the original movie. But, how bad could it be?" Now that I've seen the movie, I'm thinking Bruce Willis and Matthew Perry owe me $6.00. It was like watching paint dry -- A slow drying oil based paint, not a fast drying latex. I'm blaming the writers, because there wasn't a whole lot here that was funny and I laughed the whole way through The Whole Nine Yards so I'm a pretty easy audience. The actors did the best they could with the material and if the director had cut it like he wanted to cut it, the movie would've probably lasted eight or nine minutes, tops. Don't wear a watch to this movie, because you'll be checking it every ten minutes and wondering whether it needs a new battery.

This is not a bad movie IF you do two things: 1. Forget you ever saw The Whole Nine Yards. 2. Don't expect this to be a good movie. On its own, this is a so-so movie that you could watch on a Saturday night, blissfully lost in its confusing story and disconnected story telling. The movie actually gets better towards the end. It is not Bruce Willis's best effort for sure. AFTER you watch The Whole Ten Yards, watch the Whole Nine Yards. You will have a better appreciation for the 9 yard movie.

This is the worst movie I have ever seen. We left after about a half hour it was so bad. What was Bruce Willis thinking playing in this?! After page one of the script he could have seen it was trash. I'd like to know how much money they had to pay him to wear that ridiculous outfit in the beginning. Or who decided that people enjoy watching goons with negative IQ's fumble around on the screen. There was no plot to this movie. There was no acting in this movie. I would question if it can even be considered a movie. Don't waste your time or money on it- not even if you're bored out of your mind. Absolutely anything is better than this.

Sequels are always tricky. Rarely do they top the original. This is no exception, sadly. Matthew Perry was excellent, making the script seem improvised and flipping his lines with gusto. The others, especially Amanda Peet, are good. The strange exception in Willis, but it seems more the fault of the awful script than Bruce's talent. He mugs, he hams it up, he does everything but act. Nonetheless, this film cruises on the strength of the first one, so it does end up watchable, but I was always waiting for it to get better. Sadly, it doesn't. Bad script = bad film. This happens frequently in sequels - afraid to miss the boat, they throw everything in but the kitchen sink, and then add that as well for good measure (in this case, a sleeper hired gun, like Amanda Peet in TW9Y). No wonder poor Bruce is mugging at the camera. He's desperate, and so are we after 30 minutes into this mess.

Do not bother to watch this. After having seen the whole nine yards which had some really funny moments, this is just over the top nonsense. I certainly did not watch it finish as from moment one it shows where this was going. Utter waste of time and money. Doesn't even merit one star.

THE WHOLE TEN YARDS This movie is a 90 minute span of nothingness, coated with bad accents and derby hats. It's as if the director lost all the scripts and told Matthew Perry to wing it for 90 minutes. Being the Chandler he is, Perry decided to say the same joke but re word it a few hundred times. And who do directors turn to when they've given up on their latest movie that I hate, Kevin Pollack of course. You also could've answered that with Kevin Bacon. Pollack's performance resembles one of a 5 year old Mexican immigrant in South Beach pleading for strangers to give him attention and money. As for the plot, I'm not going to waste precious time that could be spent watching Audition again re telling the most linear story to come out of Hollwood since...the last Amanda Peet film. VERDICT: 1/2* out of ****

The Whole Ten Yards is an okay movie. It was sometimes boring, sometimes funny, sometimes stupid, sometimes everything. **************Potential Spoilers************** Matthew Perry was so silly in this movie. He made no sense in this movie. He tries to hard to be funny and he was really stupid in this film. When the balloon popped and when his in the house trying to get the guns, was that supposed to make laugh really hard, no it was dumb and silly. Bruce Willis gave a unique performance. It was good and bad at the same time. His character was so weird trying 2 b a girl or a house wive whatever he was. The * scene was uncalled for and definitely unexpected. It was weird when Matthew and Bruce were in the bed together oh dear. This movie has a dumb plot which makes no sense. It goes out of proportion to much and the supporting cast were okay. The movie is somewhat enjoyable, a little disappointing and boring, but its an okay film.

This movie really sucks! Even a 4 years old kid would find this "movie" boring! The screenplay is so stupid, empty! Matthew Perry who was so brilliant in the "Friends" soap couldn't help himself to caricature Chandler Bing... Producters must really think we are stupids to give this s h i t to us! Beurk! I don't understand how such a good actor can play in this kind of movie. I don't think he needs money! He should respect his fans and not compromise himself in theses insanities! Why producters don't give good characters to "Friends" actors ? There are brilliant but even a good actor can save a bad movie... I think people who go and see this movies are to blame because producters don't have to improve theirs movies.