The Lost Legion

boring, no action

legion

source: The Lost Legion

Acting skill is lost, as well as a plot that makes any sense at all. The fighting scenes, cheaply done in a very small set, are contrived. The sex scenes look like the trailer to a cheap * movie. The dialogue is spoken so slowly as if to lengthen the movie. My time watching was ultimately what was lost in the Lost Legion.

I watched the first 30 minutes or so, and tried to ignore the bad acting and costumes, I was hoping the plot would be good, and it was weak. It is soft * with a British accent.

You would think a movie about the Roman Empire, even at its end, would be good. You would be mistaken. The acting isn't that good; there are quite a few adult films which have better acting. The script could have been a lot better. Too bad it wasn't. The action was okay for a low budget film. No great shakes. There are lots of semi-naked women throughout. While the inclusion of this 'bevy of beauties' does take the sting out of the lameness of the movie, it still isn't that good. It's like it tries to be the continuation at times of the Spartacus 4 season series. It fails. Watch it if you get bored.

This film was a bit ploddy .It does entertain in places but not very convincing.

I love historical movies, on condition (apart from decent acting, script and settings) that the average viewer should be able to understand what historically is going on. Here unfortunately this is not the case, as least in my opinion. Story and script are the biggest problem. In stead of simplifying the tumultuous historical period that this movie is about, they made it even more complicated, with an abundant dropping of names of persons that a layman in history hasn't heard of ever before, and who are neither properly explained nor introduced, while the characters that we see have such vague backgrounds that their actions and interactions for the most part stay incomprehensible. Tom McKay as Taranis Maldras is clearly meant to be the hero of the story, but he has hardly any dialogue, spends half of the movie chained in a dungeon and in the end just leaves the movie in gloomy silence (after which instantly the closing credits appear!). There are way too many sex-scenes that have no function whatsoever and are endlessly stretched in time, to the point of getting more boring than exciting. I guess the makers have watched notorious series like "Rome" and "Spartacus" very closely and wanted to recreate the same atmosphere of decadency, but with the very limited means in this movie the result is rather thin and lackluster, everything like settings and costumes and even the colors of the movie looks cheap and uninspired. As the bickering and scheming couple Maximus and his wife Urbina Brian Caspe and Michelle Lukes are the only positive thing in this movie and make the best of their parts, but cannot save this movie. One wonders what people were aiming at, when they took up this project, and how anybody can have looked with pride and satisfaction at the result.

Going through a phase of watching "End of the Roman Empire" movies ("The Last Legion", "The Standard") and so gave this one a go as well. After a slow-motion fight sequence (not very well handled) at the very beginning, the thing descends into non-stop copulation plus the lead participants in this (the masters/mistresses of the performing slaves) talking endlessly of plots, intrigues, machinations and political manoeuvrings. After a solid half hour of this, I could feel myself going comatose and did something I very rarely do once I have started to watch a movie; gave up and did something more constructive with my time. I am grateful for the hour or so I saved by not watching this tripe further, but resent having wasted the half hour spent watching the first third. Do ANYTHING (rearrange your sock drawer, sort your desktop paper clips according to size, polish all your shoes etc.) rather than making the same mistake! (Makes the two other (moderately good) films mentioned look like "Gladiator" or "Ben Hur" in comparison!)

Just to make things clear, have no prejudice against low-budget films despite how my recent reviews as part of my low-budget film quest implies. There are actually good ones out there that may not be the most visually accomplished but surmount that with doing other components well. There are also really lame and often even worse ones out there. 'The Lost Legion' is not one of the worst examples out there or of the ones seen recently by me. There is a huge amount wrong with it and the flaws are major, quite a lot of it is amateurish, but 'The Lost Legion' at least didn't insult my intelligence as much as other films that were part of the quest and there was a little effort put into a couple, emphasis on couple, of elements that they didn't have. Its least bad elements are that the costumes don't look as ugly fancy dress/shoe-string budget as one would fear. Also Brian Caspe's performance is fun to watch, because he not only tries but he enjoys himself too. Nothing else good going on here sadly. The acting elsewhere lacks any kind of passion or emotion, even skill or direction, with an uncharismatic central performance and a bland and charmless female lead. Only Caspe comes out unscathed. 'The Lost Legion's' uncharismatic, wimpy and annoying character writing and writing that is far too excessively ridiculous to be guilty pleasure cheese and too awkward and dull to be tongue in cheek works against them. As well as non-existent direction. Direction that fails to convey any urgency, tension, fun, suspense or emotion in the numerous scenes that need them. The action-oriented scenes, the few there are any, are the complete anti-thesis of exciting, are poorly filmed and looks so awkward in the choreography. The whole story is just lifeless, completely fails to make any sense at all and on the wrong side of daft that it's insultingly ridiculous. Nothing suspenseful or fun here and the lack of attention to visual and historical detail does annoy. Visually, 'The Lost Legion' looks cheap as sin, with an overuse of truly risible effects that never gels with the setting or looks real, dizzying camera work and editing and shoe-string budget production design. The music is ill-fitting and not appealing on the ear. In summation, nothing glorious and very chaotic. 2/10 Bethany Cox