The Lords of Salem

I've never been a huge fan of Rob Zombie. There's something so sophomoric and immature about his writing style as if he's a 13 year old boy amusing his friends by dropping f-bombs and playing The Misfits. There doesn't usually seem to be a lot below the surface of his film, but imagine my surprise when I watched Lords of Salem and found myself loving every bizarre minute of it. Zombie has dispatched of the white trash and "edgy" characters that typically populate his films and has given us a mature, stylish, and remarkably unsettling witchcraft story that feels like it could have been made my some European auteur in the 70's. From the very first scene, Lords of Salem pulls us in with a disturbing prologue featuring a terrifying performance by Meg Foster (who goes for broke) as the head of a coven of witches. She vows to control all the women in Salem. Years later, a DJ plays a mysterious record on the air that ends up doing just that - controlling all the women of Salem to do the witch's bidding. Lords of Salem is a surreal, nightmarish, and bizarre film that I'd compare to the works of Kubrick, Russell, Fulci, and Argento. It has a few missteps here and there, but it's a satisfying and unforgettable film.

This has to be one of the worse movies I have ever seen. I am currently on a horror movie viewing spree and I've watched a lot over the few days. I liked the Devil's Reject and I like Rob Zombie as an artist so I thought I'd give this one a try. BIG MISTAKE!! The movie is so slow I fell asleep after 1 hour and had to watch the other part the next day. The 1st hour was so bad I wanted to ditch the movie but then I felt like watching it just to see if It was gonna get any better. It didn't! Poor acting, no interesting plot, poor effects and terrible terrible music. I know John 5 made the music and I liked him a lot when he played for Marilyn Manson but this is way too much man. The movie doesn't make any sense and it is so bad am angry at myself for watching it and wasting my time. I would never watch that movie again unless I get paid a lot of money lol

I went into Rob Zombie's The Lords of Salem very opened minded. I didn't know much about this film other than seeing the trailers, and knowing it was Zombie's new film. After seeing Evil Dead (2013) and being completely let down, with what I thought was my most anticipated horror film of the year, I thought gosh, I hope something else comes out this year, that really surprises me, and doesn't let me down. Little did I know, The Lords of Salem would be just that. The story revolves around Heidi Hawthorne (Sheri Moon Zombie), a local radio disc jockey. When she is mysteriously sent a wooden box containing a record from a group, known only as "The Lords", her world begins to spin violently out of control. The sounds within the grooves trigger flashbacks to the town's violent past. Heidi finds comfort in her fellow co- workers, Whitey (Jeff Daniel Phillips) and Herman (Ken Foree). The apartment building she lives in, is ran by Lacy (Judy Geeson), a friend of Heidi's. Is Heidi going insane? Or are the Lords back, to take revenge on Salem, Massachusetts? I was completely blown away by this film, and in my opinion, it's Rob Zombie's best film to date. It's completely different than anything he's done before. I was captivated with The Lords of Salem from beginning to end. There are so many dark undertones to this film (substance abuse, witchcraft, and the religious aspects), and the imagery had me in all. Rob Zombie recently described the film as, "If Ken Russell directed "The Shining." I have to completely agree with Rob on that description, but I would also like to add, the film gave me vibes of both Roman Polanski's "Rosemary's Baby", and Stanley Kubrick's "The Shining." The Lords of Salem is beautifully shot by Brandon Trost (Halloween 2), and the haunting score by John5 is outstanding. The acting in Rob Zombie's The Lords of Salem, is one of my high points for the film. Sheri Moon Zombie does a great job, bringing a lot of emotion, and character to Heidi. One of my favorite scenes in the film, is with Whitey and Heidi's character. It's a phone call scene between the two of them, and Whitey is telling her how much she means to him, and how he will always be there for her. I sat there in the theater, and I actually teared up. Margaret Morgan (Meg Foster), the lead witch in the film, was so disturbing. She gave a fantastic performance, and really went for it. Megan (Patricia Quinn), Sonny (Dee Wallace), and Lacy (Judy Geeson) play sisters within the film. Patricia Quinn (The Rocky Horror Picture Show) gave one of my favorite performances in The Lords of Salem. Dee Wallace (Cujo) played a fun, self- help guru. It was nice seeing her in the film. Judy Geeson (To Sir, with Love), also does a great job here. She brings a lot of heart to the film. Mr. Matthias (Bruce Davison) plays a local author in the town. He gives a great performance, and really tries to help Heidi's character throughout. The Lords of Salem is Rob Zombie's best screenplay. As I've said before, this movie is such a departure from what we have seen in the past. I was pleasantly surprised to see this movie wasn't riddled with all the typical Zombie "white trash" dialogue. I can not recommend this movie enough. If you are able to see this on the big screen, do it. I myself, have already seen it three times in the theater and I can't get enough. No, not everyone is going to like this movie. I think people will either love it, or hate it. This is Rob Zombie's disturbing masterpiece that packs a royal punch, and leaves you thinking long and hard about what you just watched as you leave the theater. Highly Recommended.

Zombie takes the horror genre of movies to a whole new movie by bringing us a new twist in the story of the Salem Witch Trials, in "The Lords of Salem". D.J. Heidi "Adelaide" Hawthorne (Sheri Moon Zombie) receives a mysterious, crafty wooden box, with a note attached. Specifically for her, her friend "Whitey" (Jeff Daniel Phillips) opens it up, and it turns out to be a vinyl record, from a group only called "The Lords". When the needle is put on, four notes are played in succession to a single drum beat, and she begins to have hallucinations about the witches of Salem in 1692, and gets nightmares beyond belief when she goes to bed. Over time, as she continues to listen to the music, the hallucinations become increasingly disturbing and realistic; it turns out her landlord (Judy Geeson) and her sisters Megan and Sonny (Patricia Quinn and Dee Wallace, respectively) are worshipers of Satan, and are descendents of the witches of 1692 Salem. It turned out all along that Heidi was a descendant of the person who put the witches to death at that time, Reverend John Hawthorne (Andrew Prine). The landlord and her sisters are hell bent on avenging the death of their ancestors, and give Heidi as a sacrifice to Satan. The movie gets turned from creepy to psychedelic in a matter of acts. As a result, this slow, subtle change sets the atmosphere up for the climax of the film, and sets it apart from all the rest of Zombie's past films. He wanted to make another twist of the story of the Salem Witch Trials, and it has definitely creeped me out. Today's crowd of horror movie goers with their jump scares and super-gory psychopathic killer man/woman/thing really have no patience when it comes to movies like this; people like me, need to not think about what the movie is going to be about and enter with an open mind, or expect the complete opposite of spooky nudity and think of killers wanting to kill for fun (I'm looking at YOU, Jason... Freddy... Michael). Zombie, like I said before, takes horror to a whole new level, and mixes in psychedelics and Satanism in order to bring us a proverbial jewel in Zombie's crown.

I am a fan of Rob Zombie films. Going into this film I had a middle of the road expectation based upon what I had witnessed from his other works like Halloween, House of 1000 corpses etc. So lets say I did not have high expectations, but I did not have low ones either. The film starts out with some scary visuals during a black mass that lets me feel like this is going to be a fantastic scary paranormal evil movie. After the opening bit, everything starts going downhill relatively fast unfortunately. The protagonist has little depth to her personality, little background is provided on her character other than a family tree, so I felt that combined with the poor acting that she is a 2-D character. The visuals let the viewer feel like its the 70's in the proper manner, so this was achieved successfully. There is some early mystery and intrigue, but then things begin to go a little to artistic for my liking. The film quickly delves into a style of film that I can only describe as "Cronenberg-esk". It gets confusing and ridiculous in a fashion that reminds me of the Cronenberg movies Inland Empire or perhaps Lost Highway except worse. By the time we enter the final third of the movie I am completely befuddled by artistic overload. Yes, there is murder and evil things happening, but it is just a little bit TOO strange and silly for my taste. The atmosphere akin to the stranger episodes of Twin Peaks complete with midgets is just plain ridiculous. The goat riding and naked old ladies was also quite a turn-off in ways I cant even describe. The music is evil death metal, the acting is poor and the artsy feel were a bit too much. On the plus side the plot is understandable, yet not very deep, the scene's did not seem to come together very well and overall this movie was a total waste of time. It is very rare that I find a movie that has so few redeeming qualities in it, but here it is. Do yourself a favour and avoid this one.

I cannot believe some of the other reviews here. This is one of the worst films I have seen in years and I have seen Sharknado. I am not a fan of Rob Zombie but I was looking forward to this pile of self indulgent trash, more fool me. It is full of the sort of imagery that a 14 year old goth with unfulfillable dreams of doing art at a second rate college would laugh at. The plot, such as it is, is beyond stale and clichéd. The evil 'demon' looks like an umpa lumpa after a particularly good party and the much vaunted 'trippy' scenes are just silly. I watch nearly all horror movies I can find, from John Carpenter to Fred Vogel, from James Whale to Ryûhei Kitamura and everything in between so I do know the genre. And take it from someone who knows, this is crap! You want a good low budget US horror flick, watch the Cook Brothers, Salvage.

Rob Zombie has done it again with his regurgitation of films he watched when he was younger. The movie all together is terrible, Rob Zombie had an idea but it's apparent in the film he didn't know how to execute it properly, it ended up being a forced boring mash up of old horror films(mainly Kubrick). As a director and writer Zombie has the potential to do some really inventive and stunning things but some where it gets lost. The music is horribly timed and is completely misplaced in a film like this. Sheri Moon Zombie has no business being in the lead of this film, first off her acting is cringe worthy at best. Second the movie plays as if she should be younger not pushing fifty (which is apparent). Believe me you definitely pass this one in exchange for people who know how to execute a full length film. Rob Zombie seems to know only music and their video's and that's something he should stick to.

This movie is one that I'd been waiting to see as it was a Rob Zombie movie. I do like most of his movies, but this one was a failure! I didn't like it at all. It seemed to be a vehicle to have his wife play a lead role. It was self indulgent trash. Nudity for the sake of nudity, a plot that didn't do anything, this film is totally overrated. It was bumped back a few times, took a while to be completed, and I ask myself why? If it was to tweak the story or change some scenes, then it didn't work. If you're a Rob Zombie fan, and you didn't like 'Halloween 2', then in my opinion this is worse. I couldn't wait until it finished, and the only good thing about it was the part that Bruce Davison played. He was great in a bad movie. I tried to get in to this film, but in the end I just couldn't like it. I may be in a minority here, but so be it. All I could give it is a 2 out of 10 (for Davison's role).

I have been a fan of Zombies work in the past, and was excited to see this one. As soon as this movie was released, I rushed out to watch this movie. However to my disappointment the movie was very unbearable to sit through and to watch...so much so that I had to stop watching the movie halfway through as I could not stand to sit through such crap. This movie does not appear to have a 2.5 million dollar estimated budget as IMDb estimates, yet more like a $250k budget. But the low quality is not the only thing wrong with this movie (as there are some great low budget movies out there), the movie is just plain boring and dumb. I would absolutely NOT recommend someone wasting there time watching this movie. Grade F! Sorry Zombie but you flunked this one in my book...

Rob Zombie is a frustrating film maker. He is a man of many good ideas. He is capable of some directorial flashes of ability and occasional flair. He has stories he wants to tell. Yet his live action films are all so half-baked and so horribly executed to the ultimate extent of being uniformly and unsatisfyingly bad. HOUSE OF A THOUSAND CORPSES, THE DEVIL'S REJECTS and his two HALLOWEEN refries are massively less than the sum of their parts. Zombie's concepts, his vision and his creative objectives are all fine and dandy in essence - yet following gestation they hit the screen as stillborn components, constituting badly realised, dreary, boring, tasteless, lumbering, corpulent entities of ramshackle celluloid grunge. Undynamic, uneven and repugnant, uninspiring to watch and altogether tedious to a fault. Nothing he does has any of the essential components of a good horror film - they are not creepy or scary, they are only shocking by way of how amazingly painfully contrived they are and there is nothing suspenseful or thrilling to be had out of any of them. THE LORDS OF SALEM is a missed opportunity. Zombie was given full creative control, apparently, so I was expecting this to be the moment when he honed his ideas, clarified his vision and fulfilled his promise. Pre-release spin advising of the influence of Argento and the giallo movies built-up expectations - along with the Salem setting and accompanying witchcraft theme. The plot has a lot going for it - recovering junkie DJ receives a vinyl record in a wooden sleeve with a music track by a band billing themselves as The Lords. The music when broadcast over the airwaves has a strange effect on some who hear it and the DJ chick starts to hallucinate some pretty disturbing visions. Add to the mix three malevolent sisters, a proposed free concert by The Lords and the participation of a cast which includes Meg (THEY LIVE) Foster, Judy (INSEMINOID) Geeson, Ken (DAWN OF THE DEAD) Foree, Bruce (WILLARD) Davison, Dee (THE HOWLING) Wallace and other genre stalwarts. There is a great deal here to pique interest and more than enough to cause me to want to watch. Yet, it dies a death on screen. It is muddled, confused, plodding, lifeless and devoid of anything to stimulate any emotion other than mostly apathy. There is some beautiful and, dare I say, arty cinematography at times, indicative of Zombie striving to achieve some greater cinematic goal. But it all feels so flat and mundane. Most of the cast give it their best shot but they seem not to have been given a whole lot of direction resulting in their performances seeming quite perfunctory and superficial. Most unfortunately Sheri Moon Zombie lives up to her marital surname and acts like one. She looks quite cute in her spectacles and dreadlocks and she does have a very nice naked posterior - so much so that if they gave Oscars for best ass performance in a leading role hers would most likely win with little contest. It's not enough. I didn't care what happened to her or feel emotionally invested in her situation whatsoever. Mr Zombie either needs to direct her better or she needs to get some acting lessons - or he needs to get another leading lady for his movies. LORDS is more proof that Rob Zombie has a problem and that problem is in two parts. One is that of coherence and emotional technique as a director - he is severely lacking in both. Two is a resolute failure of effective conceptual realisation. He's seen Hitchcock, Carpenter, Argento, Hooper, Polanski and Romero and he knows the act well enough. He just hasn't figured out how to pull it off yet. All that apart, LORDS does represent progress in that it is Rob Zombies best cinema film to date. It's still bad, though.