The Last Dragon

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source: The Last Dragon

Trailer—The Last Dragon

The Last Dragon

The Last Dragon is just embarrassing. I'm embarrassed for the actors who are part of it, I'm embarrassed for the filmmakers who created it and I'm embarrassed that I watched it. Yes, it's very mockable, but it's also very painful to endure. I don't know if this movie is intentionally trying to be campy or terrible, but it's one I'll probably never watch again.

For a martial arts film, it has some of the dullest fight scenes. Poorly choreographed and nothing you haven't see done better in dozens of films. This was also the worst of 80s music, the lamest third rate MTV knockoffs. An elderly Berry Gordy long past his prime trying to hold onto relevance in the music scene when his last hits were a decade before. Vanity couldn't act to save her life, and the male lead was a blank cipher. The only parts worth watching are for camp. The Shogun of Harlem Sho Nuff (really?) and his over the top bluster, with sidekicks dressed in football gear mixed with discount lingerie. Fast forward to those parts and skip the rest. You'll be done in 25 minutes.

This film is just another example of Berry Gordy's futile attempts to become a movie mogul. The ironic thing about it is that it came out several years after many of Motown's top artists had already left the company and the company was not the influential record label that it had been. The only reason I ever saw it in the first place is the fact that my buddies and I were forced into it. All I can say is that this was pretty much a waste of my time. The only reason my buddies and I wanted to see it was because Vanity was in it and she pretty much was just the typical damsel in distress. The plot was lame and you would definitely get a lot better fight sequences looking at the films this one tries to emulate. The acting is marginal at best and the story is not all that great either. Also, the songs were the typical pop fluff that was released at the time. Sorry that my opinion runs contrary to most of the opinions on the film, but this had to be one of the worst films of the 1980's.

Some well-presented pyrotechnics and an exciting score cannot camoflauge the utter dumbness of this whole escapade. Amateurishly directed and acted, even for a martial arts film, and oh so very overlong. Take a long pass on this utter piece of tripe. Watch something intellectual instead, like Five Fingers of Death.

If you like stupid and fun movies, this is for you. Fun action, retarded yet comical performances by the cast, and a stupid but enjoyable plot. The fxs in the movie are so 80s it is insane, the costumes fall along those lines as well. If you don't like stupid fun movies (example: Evil Dead), then do not bother, but if you do like I said before, The Last Dragon is for you.

Alright, I acknowledge that there are cheezy scenes. I also realize that the "bad" singer is a Cindy Lauper clone, and that Vanity was a protege of Prince. All that aside, I think the filming was great. The scenes were well shot, the music did a terrific job of matching the scenes and setting the mood, and even the comedy helped to keep the show from being too much of a fight flick - in other words it was more real than most shows. The script was easy to follow (alright, predictable) but it's necessary to reach a broad audience. The fight coreography was well done, and Leroy's struggle to believe what everyone is trying to tell him about himself is the real jem of the show - who among us doesn't struggle with such problems at times?