The Chumscrubber

The Chumscrubber

Awful. Just another stick-it-to-suburbia watered-down David Lynch/American Beauty/Donnie Darko/Larry Clark pastiche. It's all about confused teenagers (yawn) and clueless parents (big yawn) and all those pills they keep popping. The filmmakers think they're creating some clever, witty satire but they're just banging the same nails into the same spots that we've all seen before. It's a soul-less drone making a film about soul-less drones. But these phony create-a-cult indie films always find chuckleheads all too easily floored by this kind of material, so it will be praised to the skies by some. They'll find the dolphin imagery deep and mysterious, and the idle kidnapping of a young boy a comment on the new generation's dis-association from criminality and its consequences. And those parents, all so corrupted and uncomprehending of their children's lives, and so consumed with maintaining appearances. Gosh, I haven't seen stuff like this since.... since I last turned on my TV set at primetime. But, golly, ain't it funny when a kid gets killed by a cop in a car crash and no one cares because they're stoned, and even the cop takes no notice (the dead kid splattered across his shattered windshield) because his mind is on other things. What, no musical number, ala Monty Python's 'Always Look on the Bright Side of Life"? Oh, but we do get a video game wraparound that gives us the title of the film. Too bad the title is useless and meaningless either as the game's title or the film's.

I recently had an opportunity to see the Chumscrubber at a screening in New York. I was very excited about seeing the film. Being a fan of both American Beauty and Donnie Darko (two films the Chumscrubber was compared to) I had high expectations and was expecting excellent writing and dark Ironic wit. The Chumscrubber seemed to lack both. The writing bothered me to a point where I actually grimaced while watching the film. The characters are just props moving about this cliché picturesque suburbia and completely one-dimensional to boot. The trendy cinematography to me felt hollow and very MTV. While flashy and pretty the Chumscrubber as a film seems to lack a soul.

There is no zero available, hence why I gave this movie a 1. I have never seen such an abomination of a film, aside from possibly Crazy/Beautiful. This movie lacks any sort of explanation for the characters actions, and the fact that it is labeled a comedy is absurd. In the making of the movie, the director claims that he wants to have parents watch this movie and know what life is like for their teenagers. If there are any teenagers like these characters then they should be the ones stabbed in the leg. That scene was the most disturbing thing I have ever seen, and made me physically sick. Not only was this movie bad, it was outright offensive. I think the makers of this movie must have slipped the actors in it some sort of pills for them to agree to be a part of this piece of trash.

I found this movie to be trite, boring and completely inconsistent in tone. It felt like no one could decide if it was a satire or a drama or a dark comedy, realism or fantasy. While there were many talented actors in the cast, the movie was so bad it just wasted them. The plot at times seemed like a farce and other times seemed to want to be taken seriously. Even the fantasy elements were ridiculous. The plot was uninteresting and shallow and many times unbelievable. Things were pushed to a point and then it seemed no one could decide what direction to take the action. It's difficult to do a serious film about shallow, self-centered suburban characters and there really was no reason for the audience to care about these people. Even the exaggerations were not clever. Where it should have been campy, it just seemed clichéd. In the few scenes where a character actually struck an authentic chord, unfortunately it was at odds with the movie as a whole.

I did not go into the chumscrubber wanting to hate it. In fact my video store clerk specifically recommended it to me. It makes me wonder if my video store clerk harbors some secret resentment against me. Maybe she found out about my netflix subscription. Anyway this film comes off as a retread of Donnie Darko. I can imagine a producer reading this script and thinking," This is weird, I don't get it, but I didn't get Darko either.... I smell sleeper hit!". All the parts were there, great actors, excellent cinematography, editing, but they didn't add up to a whole. I mean, I don't need my wholes to be obvious, I love ambiguity. The Chumscrubber's "points" about the emptiness of suburban lifestyle and the lack of connection between people, parents and their children were so blatant (and by that I mean lacking any subtlety) and, let's face it, tired that it was all I could do to finish this disc. I think the fault was in the script ultimately. I never believed in the characters, their reactions to the situations rang, even if the movie isn't to be taken as a realistic situation, characters actions and reactions should have a ring of truth. This film didn't even make me care enough to keep writing.

I've read a bunch of reviews for this movie and can't believe these people are serious. If you are over the age of 17 and have a fully functioning brain, I can't imagine what you would enjoy about this movie. The all-star cast is squandered on a tired story that doesn't go anywhere. The dialogue is weak, as it fails to be clever, memorable, funny or informative. The cinematography is completely vanilla. The characters are annoying and overdrawn. The plot is a joke, as we are repeatedly hit over the head with the "original" and "impressive" idea that parents just don't pay attention to their darn kids anymore!?! And The soundtrack is stolen from your local 14 year old's iPod. Calling this movie a "dark comedy" is like calling Paris Hilton a serious actress.

POSSIBLE SPOILER - eventually I am going to give you "the message of the film" in one line. So if you haven't seen it -- and actually feel compelled to watch it -- don't read any farther. "Wow" is the first thought that comes to mind. And it isn't a good "Wow." It's an OMG, how embarrassing, 'I can't believe he did that' -- kind of "Wow." Arie Posin creates a true classic: an incredibly pretentious MESS of a film that tries so very hard to be original, soulful and heroic...and oh, how Posin, and the entire film fails. He fails at satire. He fails at the dark comedic moments. He fails at storytelling. He fails at originality. He just plain fails at everything (with the one exception of casting.) It seems Posin just falls over himself (and the movie) trying to deliver a message we have seen at least a hundred times in the past 4-5 years. It is such a disaster -- and the most horrifying thing is that Posin fails miserably EVEN with the likes of Glenn Close, Carrie-Anne Moss, Ralph Fiennes, John Heard and Allison Janney, some of the most gifted actors of a generation. How can you make such a mess with those talented actors?! Do not assume I didn't "get" it. Oh, I got it. And do not assume I am too out of touch to "get" the message. How could I possibly miss the message. It is shoved down our throats, courtesy of Posin, and some help from a headless character who occasionally takes on the voice of a video game character. Drumroll please. And the uber-important message is this: We have all become disconnected and alienated from each other! Oh my. Alert the presses. This is newsworthy, indeed. We hadn't realized this. Thank goodness for THE CHUMSCRUBBER to bring us all to our senses. THE CHUMSCRUBBER lays blame for our alienation and our disconnection. Blame it on suburbia. Blame it on Dr. Feel Good. Blame it on video games. Blame it on divorce. Blame it on drugs. Blame it on the pressure we put on teens to succeed. Blame it on our obsession with perception and appearances. Who else can we blame? Blame the parents. Blame the bullies. Blame the self-absorbed people. Blame New Age crap. Blame everyone and everything -- because THAT is just so easy to do. I "get" the message. I have "gotten" the message in similar films, better executed films with lesser casts: American BEAUTY, GARDEN STATE, BULLY, UNITED STATES OF LELAND, THIRTEEN, PROZAC NATION, ME YOU AND EVERYONE WE KNOW, ELEPHANT, WELCOME TO THE DOLLHOUSE, THE GOOD GIRL, heck even go all the way back to HEATHERS; I could list more but why bother? If you haven't seen those, you'll believe THE CHUMSCRUBBER is earth- shattering and groundbreaking. But then I ask: Who is really "out of touch?" At least out of touch as it pertains to entertainment and film. Enough already. Please. We have done this newly invented genre to death. The producers and the director of THE CHUMSCRUBBER deserve a big industry TIMEOUT for this mess. If you make a movie about alienation and disconnection from each other -- don't blame everything! If you must lay blame, pick simply one thing. (And if you disagree, rent yourself a copy of LAND OF PLENTY by a true master, Wim Wenders. Now that is a great movie, which was coincidentally, originally titled "Angst and Alienation in America." There is a beautiful, lovely film about alienation and our feelings of disconnection. And Wenders chooses to blame one thing. Just one. Even a master does not take on everything.) When will film makers learn that simple is better. Actually, simple is best. You cannot blame everything. It's silly. It's stupid. It's childish. It's a cop-out. But most of all -- it is redundant because we have seen it all before. CFB Casting should be the ONLY people congratulated -- for enticing such acclaimed actors to place themselves into this horrific car wreck of a film!

I just watched this movie last night, and I can see this movie as being one you either really like, or you really hate. I personally found it very interesting, especially in the portrayal of suburbia being "perfect," but when you look closer everyone has just as many flaws as any other person. The performances are solid as well as the soundtrack, but sometimes the movie moves a little slow, but then again what movie doesn't? If you are not tired of the typical teen angst movie, then I suggest this movie. Although some people gave this a very bad review, I suggest you to just keep an open mind while watching it, you probably won't be disappointed. There are only a few flaws throughout the movie, and also it exaggerates parents not paying attention to their kids very much and has a few unbelievable moments, but some of it is just because of the satire. I really liked this movie and I hope you do too!

This movie (please don't call it a "film") is a mish-mosh of styles, themes and techniques lifted from the library of films these dudes must have adored in their short lives (movies like Heathers and Edward Scissorhands). All of these wishful elements that hope to become a film never gel. It really can be summed up in one word: boring. It tries way too hard but ultimately says nothing. Do we need another movie about disaffected teens in a twisted, exaggerated suburbia with crazy Danny Elfmanesque music? Yeah, there's a lot of "hype" about the movie. That's what you get when people spend $ advertising and realize they made a mistake in financing this project. A few performances are good but most are two dimensional. The whole film is two dimensional and superficial, which is ironic because if you try real hard to piece together a theme for this project I think the kids who made it were trying to make a statement against such superficiality. If you find yourself noticing the blue eyeliner on "Crystal's" eyes so much you have to draw only one conclusion -- the story is SO boring, that I'm watching the chick's eyeliner. We saw this movie at the academy and most in the audience were 70+ years old. But these folks have worked in the business their whole lives and know movies. Guess what they did at the end of the movie? They hissed! The auditorium was full of hissing seniors. Never once have I been to a screening at the academy and heard grandma and grandpa hissing. That was the most entertaining part of the entire evening. If you want to see an artful film about teenagers go rent "The Virgin Suicides". There's a film where technique exists as a storytelling device as opposed to the technique used in Chumscrubbers which merely exists as a mechanism for the filmmakers to show how "cool" they are.