The Asian Connection

I like this movie that I had to come back to do a review

THE ASIAN CONNECTION is yet another execrable Steven Seagal movie in which the actor barely appears aside from in a minor villain role. Most of the screen time is given over to young characters who have no charisma or presence, making it impossible for the viewer to care about their plight. It's yet another tale about a drug lord trying to get back some missing money, partially shot in Thailand. Michael Jai White is credited but only cameos, and Seagal delivers gruff, expletive-laden dialogue and barely fights. A dog, in other words.

This will be a cult classic purely on how bad it actually is. Some of the worst acting you'll ever see. John Edward Lee; first off, who the hell is he? I've never seen a stiffer, unnatural and generic actor who thinks overacting will hide the fact he cannot act and has no natural bond with any of the other stiff actors. Pim Bubear is so cliche in her role, her lines and her overall performance, it's not worth talking about. Seagal was just brilliant. Obese, old, slow and stupid, yet has the respect and fear of all those around him. His fight scenes are a thing of beauty, if you ignore that you never see below his shoulders where a fat, bloated body is hardly moving and cannot keep up with basic choreography. His comedic timing was on point where he was able to knock a professional MMA fighter out with a kick with so little power that it wouldn't score a goal from the goal line, and Seagal's physical inability to lift his leg higher than 1" off the ground. Or there was when Seagal flipped a table over in anger using so little power, you could clearly see if was inflated... but that's the joke, right? If neither of those make you laugh, then the tacky one-liners after an action scene will give you stomach muscles a good workout. "Guess playing all those video games paid off?" "The fish is the most sentient of animals" Or the random droppings of F bombs by Seagal when there was no other swearing in the movie. I guarentee this will be a cult classic in years to come due to the cliche plot, bad acting and all-round Steven Seagal presence turning an intended action movie into a cult comedy classic.

"Time Rush" director Daniel Zirilli's Orient-based bank robbery caper "The Asian Connection" qualifies as an average but interesting thriller. If you want to attach a moral to this 91 minute shoot'em up, it would be: 'Don't Steal from Steven Seagal.' Although he takes top billing, Seagal spends most of his time talking instead of shooting or displaying his signature Aikido martial arts artistry. The "Exit Wounds" star plays a bearded Asian crime lord, Gan Sirankiri, who gets hoodwinked by one of his treacherous lieutenants, Niran (Sahajak Boonthanakit of "No Escape"), who has hired a couple of guys to start holding up banks that launder Gan's loot. Jack Elwell (John Edward Lee of "Terminator Genisys") and Sam (Byron Gibson of "Only God Forgives") like to rob banks in broad daylight in motorcycle crash helmets and automatic weapons. This two man team scores, but it turns out that they hauled off some of Gan's dough and it was marked. Niran tracks them down after they cross the border into Thailand and threatens to kill Jack's girlfriend, Avalon (Pim Bubear of "Ninja: Shadow of a Tear"), who dreams about living a fairy tale life with her beloved. Freshman lenser Orlando Herrera's widescreen cinematography is exemplary. Unfortunately, Zirilli lacks a sense of pace and intensity. This movie should have kicked into high gear during the robberies, the demise of Jack's pal, and the final chase scene between a truck and a BMW sedan. Had Zirilli punched up those scenes this could have been a contender. As it is, "The Asian Connection" has to coast on Seagal's presence, one scene with Michael Jai White as a bald arms dealer, and John Edward Lee's charismatic presence. Every time that I looked at Lee, he reminded me of "Transformer's" star Josh Duhamel. Lee could easily carve out a career playing matinée idols and looney villains. Let's not forget his partner in crime Byron Gibson. Gibson has what it takes to make a solid character actor if not more. The other shortcoming of his promising thriller is the downbeat ending. Some may compare it unfairly with Tony Scott's supercharged "True Romance" because it concerns a guy and a gal on the loose with a dastardly villain on their heels and the girl narrates it. A better ending, memorable dialogue, and more muscle than flab, and "The Asian Connection" could have connected. Finally, a better title than something generic like "The Asian Connection" would have improved this saga.

This movie begins with a young man named "Jack Elwell" (John Edward Lee) and a beautiful woman by the name of "Avalon" (Pim Bubear) meeting on a tropical island and falling madly in love. They eventually move to Thailand where Jack and his best-friend "Sam" (Byron Gibson) then decide to get rich by robbing a bank in neighboring Cambodia. Although they successfully escape with the money, what they don't count on is the fact that most of it belonged to a powerful crime boss named "Gan Sirankiri" (Steven Seagal) who not only wants his money back but also wants the heads of the two thieves as well. Now rather than reveal any more I will just say that this film had two good things going for it: beautiful scenery and an equally beautiful actress in Pim Bubear. Unfortunately, the role played by Steven Seagal was much too limited and none of the other actors seemed capable of carrying this film by themselves. At least, that is how it seemed to me. In any case, although this wasn't necessarily a bad movie by any means, it wasn't a great film either and I have rated it accordingly. Average.

This is another Seagal and Michael Jai White where there is little of either one. Jack (John Edward Lee) has a Thai girlfriend Avalon (Pim Bubear) who works in a night club and a friend Sam (Byron Gibson) who doesn't like to be called stupid. They rob a bank in Cambodia and escape across the border. They ended up getting more money than they expected, What they don't know is that the money is marked and belongs to the lumbering crime boss Seagal. This then involves more robberies and a double cross. This was basically a boring action/crime flick. Seagal has a fight scene in the beginning, but clearly he can't move anymore. John Edward Lee couldn't carry the film as his character was to play a straight man to everyone else, people who didn't have any decent lines. This Seagal film was every bit as good as: "Sniper: Special Ops" for what its worth. Guide: F-word. Rating claims "brief sexuality and nudity" I missed the nudity.

The biggest garbage i have ever seen. Steven Seagal is awful the leading actor is awful. This movie is a total disaster. The only good thing in this movie is that British guy with his accent. Don't waste your time!

An up-and-coming delivery monster aspires to become the world #1 toenail delivery gangster. In an unconventional move first popularised in the nose-harvesters quadrilogy but since fading into obscurity, the film begins at the start of the film. The graphic portrayal of mild toenail addiction may be too close to the home bone for many, it certainly was for me so I had to immediately stop directing the film and burn all traces of it. But yes, I agree with you, this is something parallel in importance to the creation of the universe or the invention of sausage skin, so people do need to know about it, especially children of the stones. The toenail delivery monster teams up with an angry British salamander whose name isn't important. Saint Tim Martin of the luncheon meat earwig crew makes a rare cameo in the 51st nanosecond of the film. His racist mumblings are not for everyone, granted, but you can't deny that they they are integral to the first 20nanoseconds of the plot - this is a subtle nod towards Seagal's previous life as the Drink Up Please man in Wetherspoons. It was a brave move for Seagal to star only as the nose flaps in his iconic trotting heritage glasses. But it really did pay off! You did it again, Spielberg!!

An American action thriller; A story about two expatriates living in Thailand who go to Cambodia to steal a drug lord's money. The best thing about the film is the glowering nature of Steven Seagal who looks like an illegitimate son of "Dr No". The indeterminate nefariousness of his crime lord outfit is beguiling. Alas, the film has a very poor script and the characters are too feintly sketched for the viewer to get behind any of them. Nevertheless it does have a throughline of pure action and a good plot. It just has a look and feel of tackiness.

Steven Seagal has done some good, or at least watchable, films. Particularly 'Under Siege'. He has also done a lot of mediocre and less films, indicative of laziness and that Seagal was well past his sell by date, and a good deal of them are even very bad. 'The Asian Connection' for me is down there with Seagal's worst. Did not expect much, but watched it because Seagal has shown signs that he can be halfway decent and as said not all his films are bad. Also do appreciate the action genre and there are good films out there in the genre, classics even. 'The Asian Connection' is far from that, more closer to a waste of time that shows little signs of trying. Seagal, in a role smaller than the advertising lets on, himself gives another lazy and wooden performance that shows that he was not interested and wanted to be somewhere else. His reading-from-an-autocue-like and robotic line delivery in particular betrays that. The rest of the cast are just as poor though in all fairness have little to work with and over-compensate. The characters are ones we know very little about and don't care what happens to happen, so unengaging and one-dimensional they are. The dialogue is risible, with a lot of cheesiness, awkwardness and far too much talk delivered with little emotion or momentum and bordering on the near-incomprehensible. Its excessively talky nature affects severely the pacing, which never comes to life. There is no urgency, let alone tension, intrigue or suspense. The action doesn't feature enough in comparison and suffer from pedestrian choreography and laughably bad editing. The story is by-the-numbers, dull and not always easy to follow. Direction is flat and ill-at ease, while the sound/soundtrack are one-note and obvious as well as poorly recorded and the whole film looks cheap. And it's not just the editing, the slapdash effects and drab photography also. The only okay asset here is the backdrop sadly wasted by the rest of the production values being awful. Overall, a mess. 1/10 Bethany Cox