Spy

THIS MOVIE BRINGS BACK MY CHILDHOOD MEMORIES.

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Spy_360P

source: Spy

Melissa McCarthy as well as Jason Statham spoke their lines as if reading from a script, which they were obviously. It was too unnatural and stiff. Movie was like something mass produced form the Hollywood grinder. Comedy forced down your throat. Very low brow humor. Last scene was the best cause' the movie was over. Can't go by ratings on Rotten Tomatoes. 50 percent at best. I would keep tearing this movie up but it's not worth the time. I am just writing now because IMDb reviews requires a minimum of 10 lines to post a review. I you really want to see cheap shot bad comedy go ahead and watch. Damn I thought that was 10 lines already. OK that has to be ten by now. This review is drawing out like the Spy movie. Just keeps kicking you in the nuts with cheap humor. Not even humor, just force fed garbage that Follywood wants you to think as funny. I don't know why they have to stoop to a really low level like that. The lines are like instant gratification humor. I guess they give the people what they think they want.

There's the Off-Color saying that "You can't polish a turd.". But this Slick Sick gives it a try. A lot of Elbow Grease went into the attempt. This Vulgar, Low-Brow, Juvenile Junk looks great, employs many CGI Super Tricks, and delivers the thing in Rapid-Fire mode. But no amount of Packaging, Super-Stars, and yes Money, can elevate this Embarrassing Mess from the Gutter where it was Spawned. It may hold the record for the number of Cringe Inducements in a Major Motion Picture. Some Creators Like Seth MacFarlane have enough Media Savvy and Pop-Culture chops along with a Razor Sharp Wit, and He can get away with Potty Humor and Locker Room Stuff because there's some There There. No There Here, and it is the Lack of Wit that Makes This One fail Scene After Scene. it is a Non-Stop onslaught of F-Words and Insults. Some Critics and Viewers seem to get a kick out of it so It isn't a Total Waste. If Fat Stars making endless fun of Their Obesity and slinging, non-stinging insults around and Ugly Females constantly showing Self-Referential Humor about Their lack of Sexual Activity is Your cup of repulsiveness, go for It. There's more of This Stuff on the way.

This is the first movie that I have ever seen involving either Paul Feig or Melissa McCarthy. sadly I was unimpressed. Since Feig is credited with writing and directing this nonsense. he must shoulder much of the blame. The script makes no sense at all, which might be less damaging in a slapstick piece of froth, like this is supposed to be, if the film was more entertaining. The dialogue is risible. It sounds like something said by the barely literate twitter teenagers who must surely be the only people that could possibly be interested in watching this. The direction is mediocre, workmanlike and unimaginative. The casting leaves a lot to be desired. Apparently Feig has worked with McCarthy a lot, and her playing a lead in this just seems like lazy nepotism. Jude Law is terrible as the CIA's top agent, his US accent is weak, and his embarrassment is topped ( no pun intended) by his terrible toupee. saving graces are Jason Statham, spoofing his on screen persona brilliantly, but his potential is totally wasted. Miranda Hart- an actress I have never particularly liked- is surprisingly good here, and brings an energy the film doesn't deserve.

This is insanely bizarre and puzzling to me. I've seen some really shitty movies all the way through in my life. I was the one guy left in the cinema when Batman and Robin ended years back. Well, me, and one other guy whom had fallen asleep, apparently. All the others left pretty early on. Point is, I see all movies through when I first start on it, no matter what. But I couldn't bare this one more than halfway through. After around 200 cringe worthy fat jokes in the first 15 minutes, and one plump clichè after another, I had more than enough. Mind you, I'm a normal build guy, not taking offense because of any self-loathing, to put it mildly. But I do take offense in tedious repetitive jokes. I love idiotic comedies like Hangover and Project X as much as any other. I even thought Bridesmaides was really funny. During my 40 minutes with Spy, I think I smiled twice. It'll forever be one of the greatest mysteries in cinema history to me why this is rated higher than already mentioned Batman and Robin. I am probably one of the few that thought a Ghostbusters reboot had potential to become funny. Especially since I really like Kristen Wiig. But not after this, not at all. Paul Feig is on his way to becoming the Michael Bay of comedy to me.

Here's a movie that struggles between genres. It is billed as a comedy but has a level of violence that is not funny. McCarthy plays a female Mr. Bean character as a secret agent. The movie is too long and drags at times. The dialogue is so peppered with "F" bombs that just keep coming. It seems like lazy writing when so many characters have nothing to say but the "F" word. There were some interesting locations and some locations that looked like the Fox lot. There is a good twist that almost saves the movie. It doesn't have enough laughs and by the time they stick a knife through a hand you just can't wait for this to end. Don't spend a lot of money to see this in a theater, it will play just as badly in a home platform.

This is starting to become a habit for me, and I truly apologize. But, this is the second review I have for a movie/TV show where I didn't even finish it. I had to downgrade it all the way to a 1, because I have zero desire to finish it, and I don't think I laughed once during the half that I made it through. I see a lot of people complaining about the profanity, and I somewhat see their point. Personally, I am not offended by foul language, as I curse like a sailor on a regular basis. But ... swear words shouldn't be the foundation of the comedy. Actually, calling this movie a comedy is a complete misnomer. I understand why it's in the comedy section, but the only thing funny about this movie is that someone thought it would be funny. I liked The Heat. Couldn't stand Bridesmaids. I have concluded that I am not his target demographic, but I thought this one might be entertaining. Nope. And it solidified my fears that Ghostbusters is going to be a disaster. I'll never watch a Paul Feig movie again, and I'm done with McCarthy. Overweight chicks who complain about bad things happening to them should be ignored. The mere idea of her "chasing" anyone at any point in time is just preposterous. And there was a staircase involved? Give me a break. She looks like she gets winded just standing up from the seated position. The first five minutes is almost entertaining. I ALMOST laughed at the sneeze. And then I didn't smile again until I pressed STOP. None of the reviews I've read suggest that the movie ever recovers from the flat spin that it enters at the 10 minute mark, so I have no desire to see how the second half of the movie turns out.