Slayers

source: Slayers

If the rapid cuts dont make you feel like you are going to pass out from over stimulation then the horrible soundtrack cuts will. I wanted to watch a silly horror (I knew it wasnt going to be good going in) that is at least entertaining and provide some escape, this isnt it. There are just so many cuts and so much - "wait, what just happened?" this isnt the mindless movie for... ok anyone. Because even though I wanted something with low cognitive need, the plot and characters and acting are JUST SO HORRIBLE you cant even get a mindless escape from life for a bit. Because it is so horrible? Does that even make sense? Probably not. There are decent movies that are mindless, with an easy to follow plot, with some decent action and characters that they are worth watching (think some so bad but good, easy to follow streaming rom coms) but sadly this is not it. I saw the actors listed and wanted it to be decent but its just bad- and insulting to my minimal intelligence and then the rapid cuts with a jarring "who hired this DJ" soundtrack and - it's a no from me dawg. Skip it. Even if youve drank 5 red bulls and need your brain to engage, it's still just too much.

I started watching because of Thomas Jane and Abigail Breslin, before checking IMDB rating. It started off so poorly, that I had to check and the 3.0 rating made me want to turn it off. But I decided to see if it was bad/good enough to be a cult flick. Thomas Jane was perfect for his part a protagonist/narrator. The social media tie ins were good, but didn't go far enough. The live streaming with influencers the was great, but under utilized. The "How to" piece and old school fight sound graphics were cult film gold. The framework was their, the acting talent was good enough, the production value was "OK", but ultimately the directing/editing stopped it from becoming cult film. Gave it 5 stars for the attempt, but 3 stars was pretty correct.

It was a fun campy movie that has a few A-list actors but seems to try and be b-rated in its presentation. AN ASIDE: It hit on a lot of tin foil which seems to touch on some controversial issues but is thrown out there willie-nilly and then never brought up again. There could be something there, like the creators were subtly railing against the machine and makes me wonder if some of the actors in on the lines or if the were nothing more than livestock doing what they were told. If it was terrible I would've shut it off before the credits but I made it to the end and now I'm wondering who that metal band was!!

As my title states, I didn't expect much of anything from the movie. Thomas Jane and Abigail Breslin were the two reasons I watched it at all. It isn't that bad. It just isn't good. The pacing is all over the place, the story is... disjointed at best. Let's be honest though, when you watch a movie like this, you're just looking for some gory, camp entertainment. It has that - sometimes. Thomas Jane's character was an enjoyable take on an old trope. I'd quite happily watch him play the same character with a bigger budget. A crossover with Dolph Lundgren's character from Don't Kill It would be mindlessly entertaining - up there with Machete.

Part of the endless supply of awful movies brought to you by Hulu. This movie not only was terrible, anyone associated with it should question their judgement and life choices. Snap edits take the place of special effects and copious amounts of B-Roll take the place of acting and writing - not that you need more of either in this movie because both suck. How a movie like this can find funding to be produced is a question for the ages. The next question for the ages is: Why did I sit through this entire pile of garbage? If you like torturing yourself by watching movies that don't even deserve one star (apparently I do), then go for this one. It won't disappoint.

I had high hopes for this movie. A vampire movie with teen influencers and Thomas Jane as some gritty vampire hunter, it had everything to be some kind of new generation Fright Night or something. Sadly most of it is just so poorely executed. The story is rather simple. Influencers get lured into a vampire lord lair because he need them for something, they stumble across Thomas Jane character wich happen to be on a hunt for this vampire for reasons said in the movie. Yet the movie try to give us a ton of exposition on this old centuries war between Vampires and Humans, dumping exposition after exposition yet it just make the whole thing so convuluted and you never actually feel like it develope neither characters well. The rest is just rather poorly executed. Everytime the movie had a good idea, it seem to never fully develop it. The characters all (exept Thomas Jane) are pretty blank and uninteresting, despite the solid cast of enjoyable B actors. Action is nothing great but ain't terrible, music is all over the place. Some weird special and sound effects are added to make it feel "more video game" or computer-like, i dunno, but it end up just feeling weird. Yet despite all these flaws i can't say i "disliked" the movie. I was just disapointed cause i was hoping it would be cool super fun vampire comedy, but it turn out just being "meh". That said i do have a high tolerance to B and C movies. For me to really dislike a movie it need to be very offensive and boring in term of story and characters (Black Christmas 2019) or VERY badly made up (some asylum movies...). With this one i was watching it without looking at my phone or hoping it would end soon, chuckling a bit in some rare moments, other times just telling myself "ok thats a bit dumb..." but it was ...ok. Thats why ill be generous and give it a 6 for slightly above average. But i fully understand peoples giving it a 4 ot 5.

Not scary, not funny, vampire effects from the Spirit Halloween Store, Malin Ackerman's deflated face and breasts, Abigail Breslin showing why she is destined to be a straight to Redbox actress and Thomas Jane being the only one who seems to know he's acting in a dumpster fire of a movie. Apparently shot in 11 days. I'm guessing the script was written in 11 minutes by a Meth head. I understand that actors need to work for financial reasons and to stay relevant but at some point the embarrassment of making garbage like this has to outweigh the need for money. I hope Malin Ackerman takes the money she made from this and buys herself some bras.

Well, the 2022 horror comedy "Slayers" definitely had potential to be something good. And I will say that I was initially intrigued by the movie's synopsis and also the fact that Thomas Jane was in the movie. Needless to say that I had to sit down and watch the movie and have my curiosity sated. And while the concept for "Slayers" was good, then writers Zack Imbrogno and K. Asher Levin went a little bit overboard here, and the movie went from being a fun and enjoyable horror comedy to somewhat of a farce. The storyline just drowned away in the constant attempts from writers Zack Imbrogno and K. Asher Levin to put in as much crazy stuff as possible. It was a shame that the writers went overboard with mutating this movie into something rather grotesque, because it took away from the enjoyment of the movie. I have to say that "Slayers" turned out to be quite something else than what I had anticipated. They had a good cast ensemble for the movie, with the likes of Thomas Jane, Malin Akerman and others. However, the actors and actresses were struggling with having a subpar script to work with here. Visually then "Slayers" was a good movie, and that at least counted for something. While I sat through the entire 88 minutes that the movie ran for, I was only mildly entertained. It is not a horror comedy that I am going to be recommending to people, nor is it a horror comedy that I will ever return to watch a second time. My rating of director K. Asher Levin's 2022 horror comedy "Slayers" lands on a four out of ten stars.

It's a mildly fun movie to watch, but better do it with friends and beers (and no brain) because it's not really not good, it fail short on nearly everything and end up with such a week ending that it leaves you really disappointed. Thomas Jane is maybe the only thing good, but even him can't save a movie and you can feel that he knows it as he act the bare minimum (but still better than the rest), the gore is really weak for an horror movie with vampire and blood, the action laughable, the scenario tries too much for not so much in the end, all the influencer gimmick is just easy and weak, the sound and soundtrack are horrible. In conclusion, it's bad, but kind of gently watchable and inoffensive, it's a mild horror movie with weak acting , writing and gore. So to watch half drunk for the laugh.