Samurai Cop

SAMURAI COP is another hilariously inept action B-movie from the guy who brought us Killing American Style. I think Amir Shervan's earlier film has the edge in terms of out-and-out cheese and comedy, but SAMURAI COP comes a close second. The title's a misnomer, brought about because there are a couple of samurai swords in the film; otherwise this is the usual cops and robbers stuff as upstanding heroes battle gun-toting criminal gang members. This film is so much like Killing American Style it feels like they were shot back to back: the movies share cast members and look and feel exactly the same in terms of staging, fight scenes, etc. The staging is staggeringly inept, with most scenes shot in single takes, and the acting is quite horrible. The main actor, Mathew Karedas, has a long hair style that swaps from being real to a woman's wig and back again as the story goes on (the story is that he had his hair cut short halfway through the production so had to wear a wig for the rest of the filming). SAMURAI COP is a film that nobody can take seriously, so the best thing to do is to sit back and laugh at it. In this respect it becomes something of a gem, an example of so-bad-it's-good entertainment. As with Killing American Style, Robert Z'Dar plays in support as the chief villain. Others must have enjoyed this movie, because a sequel followed in 2014 (!).

Samurai Cop is a movie that is bad on so many levels that it's difficult to know where to begin. First of all, the acting performances are below average and lead actor Mathew Karedas seems to only have one facial expression. The plot is everything but clever, extremely predictable and could be described as almost childish. The dialogues are thin, unconvincing and often performed in poor English because the script was written by Iranian director Amir Shervan who didn't have much experience. The female characters in this movie are all stupidly obsessed with sex and the male characters try to look cool on purpose which makes them look like complete idiots. The camera techniques are often terrible because characters who are talking are sometimes out of frame or picture. Technicians are sometimes visible in the reflections of sunglasses or as shadows in a small room. There are numerous continuity mistakes with people wearing sunglasses in one cut and not wearing them in the next cut four seconds later, hospital rooms being filled with people that have mysteriously vanished five seconds later and people being asked to come from New York City to Los Angeles who are suddenly present a few minutes later as if they had taken a rocket ride. The locations of this film are also boring and mostly consist of exchangeable alleys, random intersections and cheap restaurants. The worst part about the movie is that the director forgot to shoot some important scenes and asked the different actors to come together again to finish the film about four months after it had already been finished. The problem here is that our static lead actor Mathew Karedas cut his long hair after the movie had been completed and had to wear a wig to avoid continuity errors. The problem is that this wig looks extremely fake and is even pulled off his head in a fight Scene if you watch closely which is the cherry on the cake of this goofy b-movie. You might wonder why this film still deserved a generous five out of ten points. The answer is quite obvious. This film is so bad that it's almost good again. It's quite amusing to catch all the obvious mistakes. The film is unpredictable in its goofy weirdness. A nice drinking game invented by two German comedians specifically for this movie consists of drinking a shot of alcohol each time the main character's wig is visible. To be fair though, it's a quite entertaining movie with a lot of car chases and fight scenes with bare hands, pistols, swords and improvised weapons. The movie also includes several soft * scenes and a shallow love story that gives us a break from all the action. I was never bored by this movie because of its vivid flow. Most action movies these days either bore with complicated background stories, endless dialogues and take themselves way too serious or are filled with exchangeable CGI effects and enormous plot holes in unnecessary sequels. From that point of view, Samurai Cop is almost refreshingly grounded and unpretentious. Fans of old-school action b-movies could be very well entertained by Samurai Cop and can give this film a shot if they are open to have some fun. My advice would be to invite some friends over while watching this film. Despite its numerous obvious flaws, Samurai Cop is still overall an average movie and not among the worst films I have ever watched like so many other people claim.

Joe Marshall (goofy beefcake actor Matt Hannon) is a detective trained in the ways of the samurai, and together with his affable partner Frank Washington (Mark Frazer), he goes after the many goons and thugs working for big time Japanese mobster Mr. Fujiyama. That's about it for plot in this knowingly cheesy, sloppy, and silly martial arts action movie mess, written and directed by Amir Shervan. Obviously he knew exactly what kind of movie he was making, and just had fun with it. Often, "Samurai Cop" offers plenty of bad movie charm, as it clunks along from one inept sequence to another. The acting is hilariously, endearingly dumb across the board, with Hannon as one majorly wooden hero. Frazer has many great facial reactions. The ladies present are delicious eye candy: Melissa Moore as horny cop Peggy, Jannis Farley as leading lady Jennifer, and Krista Lane as a henchwoman. Robert Z'Dar is great fun as Yamashita, the primary henchman. Marshall dispenses with inept bad guys left, right and centre; ultimately, the movie isn't always terribly funny, and gets a little tiresome, but it's still amusing enough to make it pleasant if not uproarious fare. It could have used some better pacing, but still delivers enough laughs for those B cinema enthusiasts looking to have a night of bad movies and beers. Six out of 10.

I would give this movie a 6 out of 10, but the wig makes it an 8.

Attempting to describe Samurai Cop is not easy. It's like director Amir Shervan and everyone else involved made this movie without having ever seen another movie before. Only having HEARD of something called a "movie" and trying to make one themselves, sight unseen, with nothing to compare it to. Thus, Samurai Cop is chock full of non-actors giving hilarious line readings, absurd dubbing, and hacksaw editing consisting of various scenes of strange-looking people attempting to communicate with each other in ways human beings have not yet seen. This is probably pointless, but here's the plot: the evil Katana gang is causing all sorts of trouble in the L.A. Area. Chinese and Japanese gangs are at war and there is violence everywhere. Luckily, the LAPD has an ace in the hole: Joe "Samurai" Marshall (Hannon), a long-haired, orange-skinned freak who just learned English a few weeks ago. They called him in from San Diego because of some sort of expertise in Japanese culture, hence his nifty nickname. They team him up with Frank (Frazer), presumably because of his mastery of reaction shots. Peggy (Moore, who apparently has taken this film off her resume) is a female cop helping them out, because Yamashita (the non-Japanese Z'Dar), Fujiyama (Rescober), and Gerald Okamura as...wait for it...OKAMURA are a serious gang to be reckoned with Back at the police station, the angry chief to end all angry chiefs is Captain Roma, the apoplectic but somehow lovable boss. This movie is absolutely hilarious. The dubbing alone is worth the price of admission. Supposedly found languishing in a vault in Italy and brought to light by Italian cinephiles which led to its eventual DVD release on Media Blasters (complete with a funny Joe Bob Briggs commentary track), Samurai Cop stands alone in its charming, winning, violence-and-nudity-packed ineptitude. But top honors must go, not to stalwarts Robert Z'Dar and Gerald Okamura, but to American hero Matt Hannon. Not credited with any other movie, and supposedly a one-time bodyguard for Sylvester Stallone, this man is amazing. Perhaps the ultimate meathead, he makes Chip Mayer look like Joe Lara, whatever that means. The fact that "Samurai" Joe Marshall is supposed to be this great womanizer is too funny. He's so unbelievably wooden, he makes the Amazon rainforest look barren. And his quasi-nudity doesn't help matters. (Nor does the quasi-nudity of Z'Dar and Okamura, but it is balanced nicely with some softcore *-type scenes that pad out the inexplicable 96-minute running time). Perhaps director Shervan was going for a Lethal Weapon/Miami Vice sort of thing, but the stunning lack of continuity or any sort of pacing make the movie seem like a complete absurdity, almost a surrealist film. Due to its breaking of just about every rule of filmmaking, it seems like a child made it. While watching the movie, you can't help but ask yourself "where did they find these people?" Apparently it was named Samurai Cop to cash in on the whole Z'Dar-Maniac Cop connection - but just ignore the misleading box art. Comparisons could also be made, at least in the buddy cop department, to Action USA, but Frank is no Panama, sadly. Naturally it all ends in the time-honored "final field fight" after Frank and Joe have killed all the mulleted goons around. An awesome, one-of-a-kind movie that seems like it was made on another planet, Samurai Cop is a classic for the ages.

Now, this movie is terrible. It's a typical case of TRASH action movie. When it is supposed to thrill, it's just a big bunch of action clichés, and when it's supposed to be funny, the jokes are so bad that you laugh at their extreme lack of fun. This movie is also a bad interpretation marathon. You try to figure out which "actor(ess)" is the worst.

There isn't enough praise I could lavish upon this masterpiece. It's the quintessential bad movie. I have seen a myriad of terrible movies and while some come close to the excellence of Samurai Cop (Miami Connection, Bolero, Deadly Prey etc.) nothing can ever top it. It's quite sad but I believe that no matter how many bad films I watch, nothing will ever come close to how amazing Samurai Cop is. I have seen all the other Amir Shervan movies he's made in America and whilst all of them exhibit some qualities that made Samurai Cop great, none of them are even half as good. Samurai Cop was the last movie Amir made and it seems that all the other movies were just stepping stones on the way to perfection. And so after making this gem he decided to retire, knowing that he has made a flawless film that he will be remembered for. Rest in peace Amir and thank You for giving us this gift. It will transcend generations and forever be remembered as the Godfather of bad movies.

A womanizing super samurai cop and his black side-kick go after the Yakuza.This film is bad..REALLY bad, it's also pretty damn funny. Matt Hannon stars as the samurai cop who looks more like a gay poolboy in the best movie of his long varied career of one film. Robert Z'dar (Maniac Cop) is the right-hand man of the bad guy. Definately a guilty pleasure movie with it's jaw-droppingly insanely stupid dialog, the horrible "action", the unneeded flamingly gay waiter, and well you just have to see it for yourself. My bad-movie grade: A Media Blaster Dvd Extras: Joe Bob Brigg's intro and commentary!!! (which is GREAT); Robert Z'Dar Interview; Stills gallery;Trailers for "Sex Bomb" (which is awful), "Strike Me Deadly", "Blood Shack", and "Mission Kill Fast" Eye Candy: ALL the main actoresses get topless and one gets fully *

Samurai Cop is sure to please all fans of B-cinema. There are many scenes in this gem that will have you doubled over with laughter. From the initial car chase, to the slow motion katana duel between Matt Hannon and Robert Z'Dar, this movie screams cheese. Its aborted plot revolves around the titular character, Joe Marshall, the "samurai" cop (played by Matt Hannon), who has been transferred from San Diego to Los Angeles in order to assist the LAPD in taking down the troublesome Katana gang. Marshall, so we are told, has trained with the masters in Japan, and so ostensibly has some greater insight into the inner-culture of the Katana. What his expertise is exactly is hard to say, however, because he sneeringly mumbles Japanese names as if they were utterly foreign to him. Indeed, the only thing Marshall does do effectively is hitting on every woman he meets in the most sleazy and tactless manner conceivable. With far more brawn than brain, it is pretty clear from the get-go that Marshall won't be thinking his way through this flick. It is a film that defies all reason and good taste. Marshall inundates the movie with incredibly lame one-liners and quips, usually entailing sexual innuendo, that find there energy more so in the playful tousling of his hair than in emotion or conviction. Whenever Marshall speaks, he appears dumbfounded by what he just said, as if didn't quite understand himself. Suspending disbelief to envisage a beach bum/meathead as a samurai warrior is just too much to expect of human imagination. And the fact that he owns an ocean side residence in L.A., with outdoor pool, on a cop's salary, doesn't help matters much. The script is blatantly racist in both message and content, and is padded with several gratuitous sex scenes. Marshall's partner is the stereotypical black buffoon who is always backing up our hero (whether with firepower or by serving as the butt of his badly timed jokes) while remaining in the background; and all the female characters are either stupid, trashy, or both. Simply put, Samurai Cop's willingness to forgo all sense and sensitivity for the sake of reproducing brainless actioner fantasies ranks high on the list of B-movies. Samurai Cop is edited in chop shop fashion; the director Amir Shervan rarely bothers to establish shots, jumping from place to place, moment to moment, without any regard whatsoever for something like "continuity." The action accomplishes the amazing feat of never once being engaging. Dialog is delivered listlessly, often coming off as disjointed, and even nonsensical. This is made manifest in a number of exchanges between characters, e.g. the police captain's wanton use of expletives (with anyone that speaks to him), Fujiyama's orders to his henchmen, and especially the speech Hannon gives to the Katana gang in a restaurant. The viewer also gets the distinct impression that there are only about fifteen sound bites recorded for this film that are looped over and over again. As for its score, it consists of a series of uninspired Casio-produced tunes repeated mercilessly that either color the film with cliché 80s sounds, or fissure a given scene with music that simply does not correspond with the actions of the characters. The general ineptitude of the film, however, results in highly enjoyable viewing experience for anyone who considers riffing on schlock to be a pastime.

After I finished watching Samurai Cop, I sat in silent disbelief for a few moments not really knowing what to think. I decided that I had either just watched one of the absolutely worst movies ever made or I had watched a piece of satirical brilliance that my puny mind couldn't fully comprehend. After doing a little research, I realize that my first notion was correct - it's bad. However, as bad as Samurai Cop is, that doesn't change the fact that I was entertained. If you do an internet search for a movie that's "so bad, it's good" (God, do I hate that phrase), a picture of Samurai Cop should immediately pop-up on your screen. It is the embodiment of what a "so bad, it's good" movie is. So just how bad is Samurai Cop? Everything about the movie shows a level indescribable incompetence. Technically, the movie is a train wreck. The direction is horrible, there is a complete lack of continuity, my 5 year-old could have done better with the sound editing and effects, lighting is literally non-existent, and visual effects are incredibly poor. Artistically, the movie isn't any better. Sets, costuming, music, and make-up are all bargain basement. As for the acting - when Robert Z'Dar stands head-and- shoulders above the other actors talent-wise, that speaks volumes about the quality of the acting. I won't go into the full backstory of how the movie was made, but it does explain a lot and is worth reading for a laugh or two. I haven't even mentioned the plot because it really doesn't matter. It has something to do with a Japanese gang that controls the drug trade in Los Angeles and the police that are trying to put them out of business. In reality, the plot is about a gang of bad guys and the cops that routinely shoot them. That's about it. With a name like Samurai Cop, I expected to see some martial arts type action with a lot of hand-to-hand fighting. But alas, this Samurai Cop and his trigger happy partner are much more at home shooting the baddies. The one or two actual fight scenes are (as you probably could guess by now) poorly choreographed messes. As bad as it all is, the whole thing is just so funny it's hard not to find entertainment in what you're watching. For example, there a scene where Samurai Cop and his trigger happy partner go visit a burn victim to get some information. This man is wrapped head-to- toe in bleeding bandages. What does our hero do? Standing about four feet from the hospital bed, he hits up the nurse with some of the most inappropriate, cringe-worthy dialogue ever heard. It's literally laugh-out-loud funny. Another example of incompetent brilliance occurs when Robert Z'Dar's character, Yamashita (yes, Robert Z'Dar plays a character named Yamashita), throws a grenade that we inexplicably and hysterically hear explode twice. One grenade - two explosions. Funny stuff. And just when you think the movie has hit a low point and can't get any more absurd, somehow it does. Samurai Cop keeps giving. Realistically, Samurai Cop is a complete disaster of a movie. If you rated it as a serious action film, you'd have to give it a 1/10. However, it is unintentionally one of the funnier movies I've seen in awhile. As a comedy piece, I'd rate it an 8/10. Averaging the two ratings together and rounding up, I'm giving Samurai Cop an overall 5/10. If you're into "bad" movies, this one is not to be missed.