Pearl Harbor

I've never written a review before but after seen how many people are saying this film I thought I better. I actually think the film was great the main premise of the film which I feel most people have completely missed is a bond between two guys that is as strong as a brotherhood hood. The alpha one who has the confidence to take over the world and the quiter one both who would die for each other in an instance. And maybe it was just me but I really did feel the emotions that they feel throughout the film. It seems like a lot of people hate the film so maybe I'm missing something but i think its a great film. The film is not totally accurate but films don't need to be and I film is long which is the reason I suspect it gets so much hate.

There are very few films I've come across which actually make you want to beat yourself senseless with a heavy object. But this is surely one of them. Quite possibly one of the worst films ever made and I can't believe I managed to watch it through to the end! Twice. Once in the cinema and once on TV! First off let me say that I can understand the need to make a compromise between historical accuracy and the telling of a 'good story'. That assumes of course that you have a good story to tell, rather than this banal boiling-pot of the oldest clichés in the book. The heights of implausibility which this film manages to attain are just jaw-dropping. Saving Private Ryan managed to interweave an implausible story with historical events while maintaining a semblance of believability. Pearl Harbor just had me swearing obscenities at the screen in frustration! I can forgive the use of late-model Spitfires in the 'Battle of Britain' sequences. What is less forgivable is the portrayal of the Battle of Britain at all given that it took place in 1940 and not 1941 as depicted here! And it is never quite explained how Ben Afleck manages to get himself released from his duties with the RAF and return to Hawaii - I guess he decided he'd had enough and so handed back his plane and uniform! Isn't that desertion in most people's book? Some of the special effects during the attack on Pearl Harbor are, admittedly, not bad - despite the appearance of what appear to be quite modern warships in some shots! But the makers seem to think that the more special effects they can get into a single frame of film then the more realistic/impressive it will be! Unfortunately it just ends up looking like an intro-sequence for a Medal of Honor type game. Less is definitely more sometimes! Talking about effects - what was that all about with the sequences in the hospital during the battle? Did they get a dud batch of film stock that had been exposed to sunlight or something? It's all very well trying to be smart with film effects but sometimes you can end up looking like complete amateurs - which I'm afraid they do here. As for our intrepid heroes suddenly becoming experienced B-25 pilots - oh pur-lease!! At this point I had my head in my hands and was sobbing uncontrollably. The boys even manage to get involved in hand-to-hand combat, wiping out an entire Japanese platoon in the process. Presumably this was to show that our heroes were capable of going toe-to-toe with the enemy as well as just dropping bombs on them? Who on earth was this film aimed at? I'm sure the majority of filmgoers are not complete imbeciles but this is exactly who the target audience seems to be. It could be viewed simply as a romantic adventure yarn (although the romantic element is dire) but it seems to want to portray itself as much more than that, which is it's biggest weakness. If you want to be a heavy-weight historical drama then you just cannot mix in the sort of love-triangle claptrap and implausible plot lines that are in this. Dreadful. Watch it and cringe.

Oh dear, what a waste of time and money and more importantly, three hours of my life. Titanic with bombs, only take away James Cameron and any sign of talent, story, pacing and throw in historical inaccurancies, clichés and a story that will make you want to throw up from all the cheesy moments. The film is really divided into three parts. The first part, the love story, the two best friends and of course the girl. Then one hour later, develop a love triangle, wow, Hollywood has never seen anything like that before! (sarcasm intended) Also add several less important characters and bit parts that you hope will die in the bombing sequence that you know is coming, unfortunately, only one of them does. Finally, the second hour, the bombing sequence begins. It's good to begin with, its good fun, the only part of the movie thats bearable. The special effects are great along with good fight sequences. Unfortunately, they even managed to spoil that with a ridiculous scene in which the two main characters fly around and save Pearl Harbor by shooting down two pilots. Now you think that with the bombing sequence over, the end of the film is near, you're just about to get your coat and run out of the movies, when all of a sudden, you're subjected to one of the most pointless hours I have ever seen in a movie, in which the survivors, and only the survivors for some reason, fly over to Japan to get revenge. Oh dear. At this point, the movie has completely lost the plot, the acting is horrendous, the editing and direction terrible, and I have lost interest in all the characters. The story has been completely suffocated with the ridiculous sub-plots. Avoid this film at all costs. Three hours of pointless clichés, cheesy scenes, unlikeable characters, historical inaccuracies and the worst direction I have ever seen. This film could have been so more, or less.

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I'm a big historical drama guy, so I was of course excited to see Michael Bay's take on Pearl Harbor. Disappointment is putting it mildly. The first qualm with the movie is that it's not accurate. It doesn't even seem Michael Bay cared to learn about Pearl Harbor. He just wanted suspense and big explosions. The second problem is that the story is shallow. Throwing in a triangle romance into one of the most consequential events in American history is bound to fall flat, and it does. You may like the romance, I just never cared, and thought it was just something Michael Bay threw in there to satisfy those that were dragged to the theater against their will. The eventual attack scene on Pearl Harbor is Michael Bay's bread and butter and it didn't disappoint, but it wasn't good enough to make up for the rest of this lackluster production.

Trashing a Michael Bay movie is like shooting fish in a barrel, but what the hell. "Pearl Harbor" makes "The Rock" seem subtle by comparison. Does that give you an idea of what you're in for? The historical bombing of the Hawaiian military installation is given the Bay treatment, which means everyone in it looks like they should be posing in an Ambercrombie & Fitch catalogue, and the terrible devastation is pure titillation disguised as an "important" history lesson. Nobody gets out of this one unscathed, but Cuba Gooding, Jr., as a religious cook, and Jon Voight, as FDR, fare especially badly. Grade: D