Ladies and Gentlemen, the Fabulous Stains

Ladies and Gentlemen, the Fabulous Stains_720p(480P)

D-lish! This is such a groovy little movie. Diane Lane as a fledgling punkette/media-* named Corinne "Third Degree" Burns. She's got a band called "The Stains" --3 teenage girls who perform in black lingerie and 6-inch stilettos and smear on layers upon layers of Rocky Horror makeup. When they land a spot on a prominent punk tour, the media latches onto their GIRRL Power-style and Corinne's contradictory motto: "I don't put out". I can't decide what I dig most about this flick: * The wannabe "Skunkette" girls who worship Corrine and share in her undying love of Clorox and Pepe Le Pew hair fashion * A blase & bored-looking Laura Dern, chewing scenery here and rocking out under the stage-name "Dizzy Heights" (!!!) * "The Professionals" --super-cheezy and super-fun! The music video at the end was wayfreakycool. They look like acid-tripping stewardesses who work for Pat Benatar Airlines So much to like here. Diane Lane kicks it. Joe Strummer & Fee Waybill are in this. All the acting is good. The music does not make you want to reach for kerosene and matches. Recommended!

There is something about this movie that makes me think that it is one of the best as well as the worst films ever made. A side of me doesn't make me wonder as to why the studio execs never wanted to release this even as a slight cult-fringe film. It isn't that. It is not a cult-fringe film. I see this as a film where in a fine and precious moment in the early 80's there was a time when the 80's was defining itself. It was kicking in the teeth of the 70's and 60's with vigor. It pulls itself off and doesn't do so without kicking it's in own teeth as well. Believe it or not there is optimism. Check it out just for the sake of checking it out. It is worth it, Loved the mall scene!!

Wow, a punk rock movie that plays like an after-school -special while staying true to the real feeling of punk. I really liked this film a lot, seeing it on late night TV. It captures an era or rebellion- I mean the era of being 13 and wanting to ROCK out and trying to find out what is real. The ex-Pistols are in this movie because the band just imploded on it's American tour and they had nothing better to do before going back to England. What could be better than being in a great cult classic? I heard that they were very supportive of the movie, but this is just a rumour. I knew a lot of punk-gals who started on this movie. PLAY THIS MOVIE FOR THE KIDDIES

Excellent little rock-and-roll satire. A teenage Diane Lane stars as a young woman who hates her dead-end life. Along with her sister and cousin (Laura Dern), she cons her way onto a tour bus as the nonexistent band The Stains. The gals can't play a lick, but get themselves on the local news, and they ignite like a meteorite - and come crashing to Earth just as fast. It's a biting little picture, and Lane shines brightly in the lead. Ray Winstone co-stars as the lead singer of a British punk band with whom the Stains tour. The movie was barely released when it was made, but it became a cult favorite later on through frequent airings on the USA cable network.

Like many reviewers on this film I first saw "Ladies and Gentlemen, the Fabulous Stains" on late night cable in the mid 80's. I loved the music as I was just digging Punk and getting into New Wave. The more adult themes went over my head but I got the gist - the conflict between men and women in the music business and how media can build up and tear down stars. I had wanted to see the film again but until 2008 it was still only available if it were shown on TV or if someone had a copy from a previous TV showing. The studio finally released a DVD of a restored print and I fell in love with it all over again. Diane Lane, 15 at the time, plays the leader of The Stains, "Third Degree" Burns. Laura Dern, 13 at the time, plays Third Degree's cousin and bassist "Peg". The British punk band The Stains hang out on tour with is made up of members of the Sex Pistols and The Clash and fronted by Ray Winstone. Fee Waybill of The Tubes plays a hasbeen metal band singer. Christine Lahti, who plays Lane's Aunt and Dern's mother, kills in the two short scenes she's in. Other notable cast members are David Clennon, Cynthia Sikes, Elizabeth Daily, and an uncredited Brent Spiner. The film was directed by Lou Adler who had directed "Up in Smoke" and was written by Nancy Dowd who had written "Slap Shot". Diane Lane shows once again her raw untrained talent in only her 3rd film at the time. Laura Dern also looks natural in her role. Along with Lahti, Waybill also turns in a great performance. The film does a good job of showing one part of the rough and tumble music business before the MTV era. It's rough around the edges with some cringe worthy scenes and stiff dialog but overall it makes its gritty point about the nature of show business and the media and about gender roles. The happy ending that was filmed 2 years after initial filming fits in that it reminded me of the rise of the group "The Go-Go's" They had started in the punk scene and moved into the new MTV scene and got the same make over "The Stains" get in the final scene. The film has reached cult status not only from the late night cable showings and lack of a previous home release but also because it influenced future women singers most notably Courtney Love. As noted before the film is jagged but Lou Adler made sure the music was as polished as possible to be heard. That of course is what is important - the music and the message. *Side Note* If you are an "Old Fart" now and want to reminisce about the film and the time of the story, listen to the commentary by Diane Lane and Laura Dern on the DVD. They were a bonus and added to the value of the disc.

This isn't the worst movie ever made, but it certainly isn't worth all the praise I've read about it either. It's a good enough cult film I suppose, but even as such it's unremarkable in pretty much all aspects other than as a time capsule of early-80's teen/punk rock culture. Also, you get to see Diane Lane's underage *, which is also a plus. Not quite sure how they managed to pull that one off. Anyway... the story had a lot of potential to be compelling and provocative, and the premise was certainly ahead of it's time, but overall it still managed to fall flat. At no point do you truly feel involved, and there are a lot of points that just don't make much sense at all. Still, as a look into that particular era, it's worthwhile viewing. Also, teen *.

In the documentary "The Making of Ladies and Gentlemen the Fabulous Stains" (which you can find on YouTube), the narrator mentions that 83 million Americans have seen Star Wars: The Phantom Menace; then he adds he's not sure if a total of 83 people have seen The Fabulous Stains. This is the quintessential cult classic. Like the original Jerky Boys tape (remember that?) it has been copied & re-copied and passed around from one VHS to another for the last 20 years. In interviews, even the stars of the film say they haven't seen the finished product. So if nothing else, you should feel special for having the opportunity to watch it. I'm part of the nu-crowd, having found this movie at a Blockbuster going out of business sale last week and buying the recently-released DVD for $3. I can see instantly how it became a cult classic. First, it features a cast of respected musicians (Sex Pistols, The Tubes, The Clash) as well as a very young Laura Dern (Jurassic Park, Wild at Heart) and a lead actress whom I'm shocked I haven't seen in any other films because she's fabulous: Diane Lane. Next we have a story about the underground music scene and a girl band's rise to stardom which predicted the whole Madonna craze 2 years before Madonna's debut album (as well as the Go-Gos and even Joan Jett). I think that's what makes this a great film--how prophetically accurate it was. The "old rockers" of the 70s (with outrageous makeup on their faces) were clearing the way for badass chicks with attitude (and outrageous makeup on their eyes). As Diane eulogizes in the film "He was an old man in a young girl's world." That theme is something you have to keep in mind while watching this. At the time, aside from maybe Janis Joplin, rock music didn't have a great history of bad girls, but audiences were demanding it. So not only does this film highlight the evolution of music, but it also foretells a new age of feminism in the industry. For me, what made the film really enjoyable was its realism. Touring with a rock band isn't all Ritz-Carlton and Leer jets, unless you're the Rolling Stones. No, touring with a rock band is dirty, smelly, cramped on a malfunctioning tour bus with shady promoters, managers and rival bands with a lot of catty attitudes. I can't think of any other film that tells it like it is. The biggest flaw of this film is the ending. I won't ruin it, but I'll just say it was NOT the ending intended by the original writer Nancy Dowd (as the rumors go, Nancy was so angry at the reworked ending that she took her name off the credits). Indeed, the ending seems a bit incongruous. But at the same time it makes sense on certain levels, so maybe it turned out for the best. Another problem is the way the film shows 15-year-old girls in a very sexual way. Sure, that's realism (as Fee Waybill says in the documentary, 'There was more sex & drugs going on behind the scenes than there was in the movie'), but it might--and should--make you feel a little uncomfortable watching a 15-year-old girl have sex. But hey, I guess that's one of the reasons why this was never the ABC movie of the week, and instead it was quickly buried for 20 years. So yeah, if you have a chance I think you should watch it. If nothing else, it's a great nostalgic trip back to the music scene of the 80s. But it's also very poignant in today's world. Diane's "meh" attitude toward life is exactly what confronts a lot of teens today in this increasingly cynical world. I'm happy that this film managed to get released on DVD, otherwise I never would've seen it. I just hope it doesn't get too popular, because that would kill some of its charm. I like the idea that there are only 82 other people who have seen it.

yes, what I would give for that. I suppose it doesn't exist. Great tune "Professional" during the end credits. And who was actually performing this version? What is interesting is that I keep thinking of this movie having recently seen Prey for Rock and Roll where Gershon is simply the "It Girl" Rock-n-Roll Star. Starting with the Crissy Hinde sound but way throatier/garagier and adding in some Joan Jett attitude/leather and the result is fantastic! ...and also reminds me of Juliette Lewis performing in Strange Days. No surprise she now has a band. ...Picture Claire puts them both together, Lewis and Gershon, I forget who sings the credits...

This film deserved a better shot at finding an audience than it got from its studio, which basically declared it unreleasable and threw it away. To be sure, it's not for ALL tastes but it's WAY better than a lot of the teen-oriented dreck that made millions in the 80s..Basically the story of the rise and fall of a street-wise girl (Diane Lane) and her punk rock band, the film has moments of satire and drama that ring remarkably true, even in this day and age. This is the only other film I know of directed by famed Los Angeles music producer Lou Adler (his other was the first Cheech & Chong monster hit "Up In Smoke")....this film has the same loose, anything-goes style but Adler shows that he works well with actors, getting fresh and inspired performaces all around. The only print seen for years of this film has been on USA Network's "Up All Night" and it was ruthlessly edited. I'd like to see this one show up on a premium channel like Cinemax or Showtime so I could see it completely uncut (since the chances of seeing it released on video are no doubt slim to none)