Killer Workout

source: Killer Workout

This movie has one of those soundtracks that literally describes what is happening on screen, but its all cheesy 80's music so it's awesome. There are loads of aerobics montages with gratuitous crotch shots and zoom ins on the girls in skimpy outfits which I guess is cool if you're into that. The plot is standard and the gore isn't much to look at, but it's a corny fun that makes this worth watching.

A woman is burned in a tanning bed at a spa. Later, at another place "Rhonda's Work-Out" women are being killed, most often by a giant safety pin. There are a lot of long scenes with exploitive camera-work covering the women doing their workouts to cheesy 80s music in their cheesy '80s outfits (day-glo colors, strange patterns, leg warmers) showing off cleavage, buttocks and big hairstyles. There are some muscle men in the gym, two of whom keep getting into fights. Surprisingly, there's relatively little nudity. There isn't a whole lot of gore either, although it does seem like bodies were being put into white body bags fairly often. One of the men carrying a bag away even says "see you tomorrow!" At one point vandals spray-paint one of Rhonda's windows with "Aerobicide" and "Death Spa." The first is an AKA for this movie (also the title of one of the songs in the movie), the second happens to be the title of a movie similar to this one, but made two years later (Death Spa AKA Witch Bitch). It's too bad they don't belong to the same distributor, because if they were ever to come out on DVD, they'd make a logical double feature for a single disc.

Boy the things that passed for entertainment in the decades before right now. This isn't actually as bad as Slasher fans may describe it, and along with NIGHT TRAIN TO TERROR stand as evidence of the influence of the dance movie craze brought on by DIRTY DANCING crossed with horror movie conventions. KILLER WORKOUT (as retitled for home video) does not have any break dancing Menudo clones like NIGHT TRAIN did, but it has something even better: AEROBICIZING!! THE PLOT: A young ditz manages to fry herself in a tanning bed in the film's opening segment. Five or eight or ten or however many years later, people start dying horrifying slasher movie deaths at an Aerobics club catering to the dumbest people in Santa Monica or Bakersfeild or Beverly Hills or wherever this film is supposedly set. Details like those are usually added to confuse viewers into thinking they are watching a story about people rather than a series of contrivances designed to kill off the supporting cast in a horror movie by their relative importance to the plot. KILLER WORKOUT is if nothing else par for the course on all such fronts, so fans of the genre will be entertained, and non-fans will have something to laugh at while drinking beer. Life is short, and this video (if you can find one) will help make it seem even shorter. What makes AEROBICIDE (the original theatrical title) kind of nifty is that it knows these things, does not dwell on them, and concentrates on the killings, some T&A, and LOTS & LOTS of footage of various leotard and legwarmer festooned big haired '80's hotties (and one fat guy on a stationary bike) working out to the film's atrocious musical score. It's like A-Ha crossed with the Bangles, and reminded me of why I started listening to King Crimson when in high school: The music of the 1980's sucked, for the most part. This stuff is especially bad, and the reason the film is probably Out of Print has to do with the rights to the music, which apparently just isn't worth bothering with to whomever owns it. Don't blame them at all on that front. So this is a nice blast from the past for anyone with a yearning to re-visit 1985/1986, has some gratuitous nudity, some nice touches of gore, a neat plot twist, a second even neater plot twist after that, topped off by an amusingly sadistic ring to the ending that says Oh Yeah, The Fun Has Just Begun. Sadly there was no KILLER WORKOUT 2, because I liked the ambiguous good/bad/insane character of the woman scarred by the accident, the fact that there were three homicidal psychopaths in the film clamoring for screen time, and the movie's self awareness about being essentially a low-rent, brutal, misogynistic little Califiornia Aryan parable about the 1980's Yuppie Workout Generation ... Who are of course all now on Lipitor and having plastic surgery to keep their sun stretched skin from sagging. People in general are still stupid in 2005, and it's reassuring to see how dumb they were 20 years ago too. We're not doing so bad, I guess: We got rid of the big hair at least. But ya know, the people who frequent this Aerobics Club are an odd bunch. They are all in amazingly impeccable shape, all gorgeous white homogeneous suburbanite professionals, and they keep right on Aerobicizin' even as the bodies pile up, and to anyone who does not inhale Drano for kicks, it's an inside job. Yet they keep jumping and leaping and spreading their bodies around, jiggling this way and that to tone up those muscles usually used when posing for Hustler Magazine, which is about where the mentality of the film rests. It's slickly made, suggestively voyeuristic, populated by psychopaths and airheads, and if I remember correctly, that pretty much summed up the 1980's.

This is one of those movies that going in, I knew it was going to be bad. Sure enough, it was; bad acting, overacting, forgettable music, more plot holes then you can drive a truck through, and then some. So, why am I giving this movie such a high score? Because, this is one of those movies that's so bad, its so damn good. The movie starts with an attractive model (we only see her body, not her face) just finding out that she got a top modeling job in Paris. To celebrate, she decides to go to a tanning salon (at night, mind you, but in typically cheesy fashion, there's an accident with the tanning bed, and our poor girl gets fried. Fast forward to Rhonda's workout, a start of the art aerobics studio thats run with an iron fist by a grumpy Rhonda (and probably grumpy actress, Marcia Karr). Then enters Jaimy, Rhonda's undependable employee, who shows up late, wearing her tight, black leotard and somehow having enough money to drive a Porsche. Before you know it, the clients start getting murdered, one by one, and enters the clueless, 80s tough guy cop (played by David James Campbell) who interrogates everybody but can't find the killer. The movie actually does manage to build a good mystery around the story, and keep in mind that we never saw the face of the girl that burned in the tanning bed. What's the connection? You'll just have to find out for yourself. To sum it up, this movie has everything (if you're a guy anyway) that you could possibly want: hot women that you just met who will take you to there home to make out, hot women wearing tight leotards, and, uh, hot women. If you're ever in the mood for some mindless fun, "Killer Workout" aka, "Aerobicide", is not a bad way to spend some time, especially with some friends. 8 out of 10

Now this director knows how to sell sleaziness.Still a far cry from the Italian sleazy gialli but more than enough to give this bad movie the spice that it needs.Let there be no doubt about it.This movie is bad.Real bad.No,not the Michael Jackson kind.I mean it could be considered awful.But it is so bad and awful that it is good.I mean I laughed almost throughout.It went from one hilarious scene to another.Which was intensified by the fact that everything was taken seriously by director and the actors.Resulting in a parody of the slasher genre without intending it to be.Pay special attention to the detective who thinks of himself as a hard boiled and intelligent cop who is amazingly stupid.There is not one moment in the film where you can look at him in action and say now that is some fine acting.Not a hint of damn,"I got to pay the bills that is why I am in this rotten movie".On top of that the director tries to make a film that combines all the Eighties goodness or badness whatever you prefer resulting in something that I could describe as one huge mistake. Slasher,kungfu flick,crime film,flashdance type film,you name it is there.And of course enough crotch and boob shots to please the people who like that sort of thing.Who me?I can't deny giggling at some of the gratuitous shots made.It was like,"we are serious film makers trying to film scenes where serious actresses portray some difficult exercises and these are so difficult in fact that the camera has trouble recording them so we have to zoom in to spots we know very well to get back on the right track.Well,we got lost a lot of times."Or some other excuse like this.OK,I admit it I was expecting these shots and thank god they were there.Otherwise the film would not have been nearly as entertaining as it was.Do I really need to explain to you why Killer Workout is not a proper slasher or horror film? Even when there was enough present to come close.From start till the ending you will be entertained by the randomness of the events and more so when the killer and the motive is revealed.It is beyond ridiculous.But it won't matter much since you had fun for 90 minutes.

This is quite possibly the most retarded 80's slasher ever realized, but how can you be harsh on a film that features non-stop images of dozens of gorgeous ladies with exhilarating bodies doing aerobic exercises, taking showers and wandering about in tight gym outfits? Prior to being a horror film, "Aerobicide" is a 90 minutes promo video to encourage the use of steroids, silicons and other body-stimulating fitness products. If you'd leave out all the footage of hunky boys lifting weights and yummy girls wiggling their butts and racks to insufferable 80's tunes, there probably only have about 15 minutes of story left. Plenty of time to improvise a plot about a sadist killer slaughtering young health-freaks with a big safety pin (yeah…). The film opens with an unintentionally hilarious scene of a girl getting fried between an electric sun-bathing device. Several years later people turn up dead in the same spa. You don't really need to be an experienced horror fanatic or a rocket scientist to figure out there's a link between the murders and the burning incident, now do you? Investigating the case are a seemingly braindead police officer (and Charles Napier look-alike!) and a beefcake private detective who gets lucky with the bustiest 80's beauty I've ever seen! Looking through the credits, her name's Dianne Copeland apparently, and she didn't do anything else apart from this turkey and an imbecile Troma-movie called "Surf Nazis Must Die". What a wasted opportunity! She may not have been a great actress, but she sure had two other BIG advantages that would help her move upwards in show business. The amount of gore and the quality of the make-up effects are nothing special, neither. We're treated to a couple of bizarre stabbings with a pin and some barbecued human flesh. The plot twists near the end are ridiculous and predictable, but by that time nobody is taking the film seriously anymore, anyway. "Aerobicide" (a.k.a. "Killer Workout") is recommended in case you want to switch of all your brain functions off for one night, but nevertheless feel like watching a film! It actually would make a terrific double-feature with "Death Spa". Both films have a lot of sexy and scarcely dressed babes … and both films are pretty dumb.

Set in Rhonda's Work-out, an L.A. aerobics gym where the only the gorgeous are welcome (well, with the exception of a token fatty on an exercise bike, presumably there for the hard-bodies to make fun of), Aerobicide sees a killer hacking through the establishment's clientèle with a giant safety pin (!). Meanwhile, police detective Lt. Morgan (David James Campbell) and private investigator Chuck Dawson (Ted Prior) attempt to uncover the identity of the murderer, and gym owner Rhonda Johnson (Marcia Karr) tries to prevent her customers from cancelling their memberships. As a slasher film, Aerobicide is a complete failure, devoid of scares, tension, or decent kills (there's very little in the way of gore); however, as an opportunity to ogle hot 80s women flaunting their flawless, toned bodies in skimpy lycra outfits, it can't be beat. With the 'horror' regularly punctuated by cheesy 80s dance routines, fans of the female form are guaranteed plenty to enjoy: shapely butt's gyrate, groins thrust, and big breasts jiggle to a hi-energy disco soundtrack, and additional titillation comes in the form of a nekkid bird who gets grilled like a cheese toastie in a sun bed, tasty Teresa Van der Woude whipping her top off during a dream sequence, a victim being killed whilst taking a shower, and buxom Dianne Copeland flashing her ample charms in a bikini that is quite clearly struggling to contain such a well developed physique. Fans of trashy 80s nonsense should also get a kick out of an unbelievably hideous gold and black outfit worn by Rhonda, a couple of ridiculous punch-ups between the gym's beefcake male instructors, one of horror cinema's silliest jump scares in the shape of a spring-loaded rubber arm (which pops out a locker not once, but twice), and a seriously unconvincing wig (to explain more would be to spoil the film, but you'll know what I'm talking about when you see it). If you've watched and enjoyed similarly themed slashers Death Spa and Murderock, then this voyeuristic piece of low-brow entertainment from the days when big hair and leg-warmers ruled the world will no doubt also hit the spot.

What can I say about Killer Workout? It's a great horror film. It's original and scary (unlike most horror films today, their all the same). Killer Workout is also unpredictable, fast paced and contains funny moments. Great performances from Marcia Karr, Ted Prior and the rest of the cast. I think they should re-release this movie!! I would be first in line!!!

Ah yes.. Killer Workout. WHO THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA??! Oddly enough, there is a whole little sub-genre of this type of film, so if watching frizz-haired leotards bounce enthusiastically to songs called "Animal Workout" while evading certain death at the hands of a crazed fitness director or bloodthirsty demon is your cup of tea, I'd recommend this or Death Spa. Killer Workout is bad. I'm not even sure if it's good bad.. it's bad, that's all I know. Alright, let's review: 80's skank? yes. Do said skanks get naked? yes, unfortunately. the only t&a in this film, aside from that which was constrained by spandex, belonged to the crazy killer burn victim girl. yuck yuck yuck!!! very disturbing. More plot inconsistencies than you can shake a script at? yes. Problems with continuity? yes. Stupid plot? yes. (consider, if you will, the tragic story of a fashion model who is involved in a terrible freak accident involving a tanning bed that spontaneously combusts. she then goes on to open a fitness club and proceeds to systematically slaughter the pretty female clientelle with a safety pin.) Ridiculously fake gore? oh my yes. Equally ridiculous instruments of death (such as safety pin and trash can)? you bet. Guaranteed good time? hmm.. maybe. you'll get plenty of chances to hurl MSTies at this one, that's for sure.