Friday the 13th

16 and 1.11.10

Feel like a Horror film.

why is the fucking subtitle so early

Jasons runs? What a bunch of bunk. He's a slow, plodding stalker. He's supposed to take his time while you run from him. Yet, somehow he beats you there. That used to be a common theme, a sort of impending doom. No matter what you do you will not be able to escape. In this piece of junk, he runs. Jason thinks? That's right. He has traps set. And warning systems in place. Jason takes prisoners? That's right. He's smart enough to think clearly enough to set traps and warning systems, but he's not smart enough to understand that a teenage girl ISN'T his mother. Did I mention that Jason runs? Seriously. I'm still angry about this. None of the characters are even remotely likable. They are overly done stereotypes, but not the stereotypes we all know and love. They are just dumb versions of stereotypes. None of the deaths are even remotely memorable. They are just your average run of the mill "someone gets stabbed with something" kinds of deaths. Seriously, Jason runs almost the entire movie!!!! For me, though, the topper of it all is that Jason didn't once get confused and tilt his head. Not once. And he had quite a few opportunities to do so. Like when he was running he should have looked at himself and thought "This makes no sense." Or when he was setting traps and warning systems. Or when he was holding a girl hostage because she kinda looked like his mom. This movie almost makes Jason X look like a decent movie.

THe Friday the 13th films have never been what you would call good movies. For me they have always been guilty pleasures, but not something I would recommend to fans not into gory movies where there are occasional scares but no real suspense built up. After seeing this latest entry, which is really a remake of the first four films into one, I can't really say its bad. Horror movie fans who love creative killings will love it, but if you're not a horror movie fan of the slasher genre, then I really can't tell you to see this movie. However if this is your type of thing, go see it. Now on with the plot, which I really won't go into detail about because we already know what it's about. It starts off with a pitiful prelude that goes back to 1980 and found me rolling my eyes, but afterward it gets better. Young adults go camping, young adults die in nasty ways. THe one wrinkle added to the story is that one of the character's (Jared Padelecki from Supernatural on the WB) is brought into the story because he is looking for his sister. THis sister was involved with the first group of victims, and now there is this second group who know of nothing that has happened to the other group because it has been about six weeks since the first group went missing. You all know what happens next, so I won't say anything more. Most of the cast was competent, better then many of the ones from the earlier films. THere were a few who were annoying, but that is part of the Friday The 13th scenario. I like the new Jason because he is much more active in the role, much like the Jason from the 2nd and 3rd entries back in the early to mid 80s. I will give the movie a solid 7 out of 10. It went out and did what it was supposed to, but if you are more into the suspenseful horror films, and not hack and slash with a few jump scares, then Friday the 13th 2009 is not for you.

In response to Wayne Malin, the acting is much better than in the rest of the movies, you do hear the ch-ch-ch-ch-ah ah ah ah in this, and for those of you who don't recall, the original did have nudity in it. Remember Kevin bacon's big sex and death scene? I'm thinking Wayne here didn't even bother seeing this movie and is one of those guys that sits on IMDb all day on his mothers MAC. This movie is a lot of fun, and has what I personally enjoy. Hot chicks having sex and getting killed, silly comic relief types a la Jimbo and Ted from the final chapter and good splatty murders. Is it going to change the world? No, it is a good 95 minute mind jelly movie. Don't go into it planning to over analyze it. Just enjoy. Its a good time.

Friday the 13th has an incredibly powerful first 15-20 minutes. It really kicks off with a bang. Jason is back better than ever. Then something goes fractionally wrong and we fall back into old territory. Everything becomes a bit too familiar. Still, it does better than most horror films in the sense that it really doesn't become too tedious until the last 10 minutes or so. The main characters are strong in their performance without being memorable. The cameos are the real scene stealers including a gas station attendant and a man named Donnie. A lot of the jokes from all concerned really hit the mark though and are a nice touch to the film. The Friday the 13th remake is what it is and at the end of the day probably all that could realistically have been hoped for. It won't decrease the seemingly ever growing hate of remakes, but it certainly won't add to it either and that in itself is an achievement.

Friday the 13th_360P

likey

I know he didn't direct it, but this has Michael Bay written all over it: glossy thrills, offensively stupid characters and a complete disinterest in complexity or surprises. Even the scares, which aren't bad, are ruined by ridiculous predictability, and visuals so dark and shaky they're nearly impossible to comprehend at times. SIDE NOTE: Title card at 23 minutes?? Wow...