Deathsport

source: Deathsport

Holy Mozzarella! I can not believe this was *not* made by Italians. It's about as bonkers as Castellari's THE NEW BARBARIANS. And it's definitely far more warped. David Carradine plays some kind of futuristic hippie-warrior (they call them Range Guides, or Mystical Nomads if you will). He gets captured, imprisoned and forced to play the Deathsport game. He escapes on a silver bike, together with his fellow-hippie love interest and some blond dude who can't act. The rest of the movie they get chased by the evil Richard Lynch on a bike. Oh, and there's mutants running around the wastelands too. Bonkers, I tell you. There are a few charming matte-paintings to behold (mainly of two futuristic cities). Lots of psychedelic color schemes, full frontal female nudity and utterly spaced-out sounds. Will you just listen to those motorcycles when they fly by? They either sound like they're screaming or farting. Even those plastic see-through swords of Carradine & his girl make undefinable "weesh"-sounds. Those big red-laser-beaming hand-blasters are pretty mind-boggling too. People and things get all red and vanish into thin air when they get hit. One of the highlights is the sequence where Carradine (on his bike) gets chased by Lynch and his henchmen (also on bikes, of course). They drive into some abandoned military domain, and end up driving some sort of improvised but pre-arranged race circuit. There's really no explanation as to why it's there. It's just there, although it shouldn't be. Plus, during their pursuit, things just keep blowing up and randomly catch fire. In the end, Carradine and Lynch get to face off one another during a weirdly edited sword-boss-fight. The outcome? Evil Lynch gets decapitated and Carradine gets the girl. I love it when a movie ends that way! Well, not just any movie, of course. Only the ones that star David Carradine as a womanizing hero. Well, "womanizing" probably isn't the exact word; as she's more like some soul-mate or something. But whatever, he gets the chick and that's what counts.

This film has an abysmal 2.8 rating on IMDb, but I didn't think it was anywhere near that bad. In my opinion, a movie can only really be bad if it's boring, and this movie isn't that. It is cheap and poorly made, but it's moderately fun and you can laugh at it. So it's not any kind of horrid failure. It's kind of an unofficial follow-up to one of Roger Corman's more popular productions, Death Race 2000, in that it's about a motor sport created to distract the unwashed masses and stars David Carradine. It also takes place in the future. This future is post-apocalyptic, and David Carrdine, along with hottie Claudia Jennings, are warriors who live in the wastelands. They are captured by "civilization" (which includes crazy ruler David McLean and his minion Richard Lynch) and, along with a doctor who diagnosed McLean's sanity and his rebel son (William Smithers and Will Walker, respectively), they're forced to participate in deathsport, where they basically try to survive while menacing soldiers on deathcycles try to waste them. The titular deathsport really only lasts for a few minutes in the film, and then the rest of the movie has the four heroes escaping on the deathcycles while pursued by Lynch and his thugs. The movie ends with a hilarious duel between Carradine and Lynch, using "whistlers", which are clear plastic swords that whistle when you swing them.

This is the ultimate "get your freinds togeter and yell at movie"!! Agreed the effects are cheap, the acting bad, and the "jet" motorcycles. But it's endering in it's ineptness, defiately worth a rental.

For sure, the camera pays as loving attention to the impressive slow-motion explosions as it does to Claudia Jennings' * form. More so, in fact, and more's the pity. The explosives credit is given to Roger George, who took advantage of every possible excuse to send fireballs roaring into the sky, so if that was you, Roger, we salute you! Otherwise, well, you know you're in trouble when the movie opens with David Carradine riding on horseback in a fur cape and a loincloth, a scene which left me asking myself, "If I had a hand blaster that would vaporize people, would I really bother carrying around a heavy-ass sword?" The answer is, probably, because Range Guides think swords are awesome cool just like everybody else. For most of its brief running time the movie is an unexceptional assemblage of awkward action scenes...for example, when the good guys battle the bad guys on motorcycles, it's rarely clear which stunt guy getting blasted is supposed to represent which actor...and cheesy dialog, although the late great Richard Lynch must have thought it ironic to mutter the lines "A man is a candle...He must set himself afire to create a life." That the movie credits two directors might explain why the final duel, which is set up with a sweeping 360-degree tracking shot, has a sense of style and grandeur which the rest of the movie is sorely lacking, clearly inspired by someone watching a lot of samurai and Wuxia films. Suddenly we realize that wow, this really IS what we were waiting for the whole time, just as David Carradine was waiting for a chance to finally show his stuff.

Worst movie I've ever had the displeasure of watching. Reminds me of something they would show on Mystery Science Theater 3000. The effects are God awful, they look like they spent $5 to make this movie using a home video camera and a VHS tape, and the sound effects on Atari are better. I will never get the time back in my life that I wasted watching this. It was good for a laugh I suppose lol. Not sure why they even have this movie on Netflix, unless of course it is for entertainment purposes for people bored out of their skulls. I see many mistakes in filming, they most likely put the props together in someone's back yard shed, and the actors were probably homeless people picked up off the streets. Oh but there is full frontal nudity, so it was all worth it. I only wish they knew how to use razors in the 70's :/

*MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS* The basic, and I mean basic, premise of this film is that a deranged president (John Hulmes) and his `Statesmen' capture wandering nomads to fight against `death machines' to gain their freedom and to satisfy his sadistic needs. However, the President's mental health is failing and sensing weakness, his right hand man Ankar Moor (Richard Lynch) decides that the time is right to increase his own grip on power. Whilst this may sound like a promising story line it is unfortunately as far as the writers managed to develop the script, so essentially a five minute idea gets padded out to make a 90 minute film. This is achieved by adding a completely pointless `sub-plot' involving mutants kidnapping a young girl from Deneer's (Claudia Jeenings) tribe and lots of footage of bike chases. Who the mutants are and why they kidnap the girl is deemed by the writers to be completely irrelevant to the viewer. The prop budget in this film is minimal to say the least and makes a Dr Who episode seem grossly lavish. The `death machines' are essentially motorbikes with bits of silver metal attached and have an alarming tendency to explode at slightest contact (reminiscent of The Simpsons' vehicles). In fact a large chunk of the budget must have been spent on pyrotechnics because things explode and catch on fire throughout the last half of the film. The dialogue is extremely cumbersome and was probably written during a heavy smoking session. Corradine seems distracted and listless, whilst Lynch half-heartedly hams it up, leaving only former Playboy Playmate Jeenings seemingly intent on making any effort. This being a Corman production she of course has to be * at some point (which must be considered a positive in this film) and she duly obliges during a bizarre light bulb torture scene. The same device is also used to provide a rather lame conclusion to the President story line. Another oddity in this film is the `musical score' which at times sounds like the keyboard player is suffering from a fit and at times alternates between droning sounds and jazz! The sound effects seemingly `borrow' heavily from the Star Wars library – listen out for what sounds like Vader's breathing, the phazer effects and the Tie-Fighter like `screaming' sound whilst the bikes travel through the tunnels. With the film meandering aimlessly mid-production and in danger of not getting finished Corman stepped in and the sense of desperation can be seen in the final product. This is essentially a poor second cousin to Deathrace 2000, a film that strangely benefited from Stallone's character. I'd only recommend this to Corman die-hards or cult completists. Note: Watch out for the unfortunate extra who gets unintentionally set alight during the cave scenes (you can see him frantically diving to the ground and becoming engulfed in a plume of extinguisher vapour).

"Deathsport" is one of those films that have been lying on my DVD-shelf unwatched since years already because, quite frankly, it always looked like a really stupid movie and I have to be in a rare and specific mood to enjoy really stupid movies. But right now I was in urgent need of a movie starring David Carradine and this was the only one within reach. Come to think of it, I ought to have selected a much better movie for my tribute to this terrific cult/action cinema legend that sadly passed away this week (3rd of June 2009). "Deathsport" is a prototypic Roger Corman product from the late 70's. Obviously cheap and rapidly put together in order to further cash in on the unexpected but giant success of the previous "Death Race 2000"; also starring Carradine and also set in a crazed futuristic setting. But apart from this handful of superficial elements (also including the similar title), there's actually no real connection between "Death Race" and "Deathsport". This is merely an attempt to imitate "Star Wars", with a lot of cheesy light-and-laser weaponry, and an unintentional predecessor to post-apocalyptic gladiator movies that became particularly popular during the 80's. In a very distant future, practically the entire world has been destroyed due to nuclear warfare. Only a few big cities are left, surrounded by endless wastelands where cannibalistic mutants are continuously on the prowl. Life inside the big city isn't that much better, though, as Lord Zirpola is slowly going bonkers through brain disease and becomes increasingly obsessed with "Deathsport". This is a Roman-type of arena battle and Zirpola ordered his right hand – the malignant Ankar Moor – to capture the mystically empowered Range Guides Kaz Oshay and Deneer to fight till the death. The Guides are good hearted nomads, however, and rather than to obey and fight, they flee into the wastelands. Okay, admittedly this sounds like a rather complex and ambitious plot, but I can assure you that "Deathsport" is actually a pretty brainless and rudimentary Sci-Fi vehicle. Everybody always complains about the low quality level of early 80's Italian apocalypse movies, but honestly flicks like "The New Gladiators", "The Atlantis Interceptors", "Endgame" and "The New Barbarians" are a whole lot better than this dud. "Deathsport" is boring and repetitive, with really laughable special effects (the vaporizing weapon looks like a vacuum cleaner) and pitiable scenery (the so-called Death Machines are ordinary bikes with a metal plant on the front). The only highlights in the film occur whenever Richard Lynch appears on screen, as he gives away a deliciously over-the-top cheesy performance as the evil and crazy-eyed Ankar Moor. Well okay, other highlights include Claudia Jennings' multiple * sequences and the scene where a dude drives off of a tremendously high cliff in slow-motion. David Carradine is sadly mundane and uninspired in this lame production and this definitely isn't one of the movies he'll get remembered for. I can list at least two dozen of movies that I rather watched instead. Rest in peace, grasshopper. You were the total definition of cool and handsome.

This should have been a fun movie, but the directors took all of the fun out of it. It's just an action movie, and probably would've been better with horses, but motorcycles are somewhat more cinematic than other motor vehicles. Still, while it's people killing each other on motorcycles, it makes no sense. Very early, a bunch of guys kill off the gorgeous sexy girl (I guess they're gay, I don't know} and there's nothing for the guys to be interested in). Then there's a bunch of boredom after that. Like I said, nothing at all for the guys, and for women, only die hard biker babes could keep interested in this. So we have a movie that is supposed to be Action, which comes across as no fun for the male audience, and actually boring. I don't know if I'll put it on the ten worst movies ever list, because I think to make that kind of list, you have to have "great expectations", and there really isn't any great expectation for this.

The previous comments hit the mark perfectly. This is one of the clunkiest, most inept, most plotless post-apocalyptic "sci-fi" flicks you're ever likely to see. Claudia Jennings has a showstopping * scene, but that's not a strong enough reason to sit through "Deathsport"'s awful sound effects, insufferably bad dialogue and lame action scenes. (*1/2)