Death Spa

It's no secret that one of my favorite movies of all time is David A. Prior's 1986 classic KILLER WORKOUT. Given that, imagine my joy when I discovered there was another workout slasher made in the eighties. I somehow knew it wouldn't top KILLER WORKOUT, but it's near impossible to not enjoy DEATH SPA. Michael is the owner of a prestigious spa that's run completely by a large computer system built by his ex-brother-in-law David. You see, Michael's wife, Catherine, had a miscarriage, which severely damaged her spine and committed her to a wheelchair. Depressed, she doused herself in gasoline and set herself on fire. Well, now someone, or something, is killing off members of the spa. Is it Catherine, back from the dead? Or is it David, out to avenge his sister? Or is it someone else trying to get Michael to lose the spa? DEATH SPA is great, but for all the wrong reasons. I imagine this movie had a budget twice that of KILLER WORKOUT, yet the quality is still the same, and maybe even worse. This is definitely a movie made solely to show off some fancy gore FX, so the writing is very sloppy and very funny. Sometimes the hilarity is the result of just bad acting, but sometimes, you can't help but wonder if they actually could have done better, given the material. This is sad, considering some of the actors have done bigger things. There's Ken Foree (DAWN OF THE DEAD), Merrit Butrick (STAR TREK 2&3), Brenda Bakke (L.A. CONFIDENTIAL), and Frank McCarthy (THE RELIC). DEATH SPA definitely doesn't skimp on the gore, with inventive deaths, a huge body count, and lots and lots of grue. One guy's face falls off, another gets boiled alive by hot water, another explodes, etc. The effects aren't the greatest, but did you really expect them to be? I will say that DEATH SPA beats out KILLER WORKOUT in the death and gore department, but then again, there aren't any deaths by giant safety pin in DEATH SPA, are there? That's really all there is to talk about with DEATH SPA. It's not scary in the slightest, the gore is great, some of the kills are so absurd they're hilarious (death by fish, anyone?), the writing is beyond awful, and it is sort of sad to see these stars appearing in, well, THIS. Needless to say, it's required viewing for every organism on Earth.

Judging by the movie poster, I expected a really bad, almost unwatchable B-Movie. Don't be fooled by the poster, though, 'Death Spa' was better than expected. It is still a B-movie, we can't escape that fact. But the film featured better characters and a better story than expected. William Bumiller stars as Michael, the owner of an executive, high-tech health spa - and this man is so sexy! When club members start dying, the film becomes a murder mystery thriller - and a rather interesting one at that. Michael's wife, Catherine, died a horrible death a few years ago and he is trying to move on. Only, Catherine won't allow him... Yup, there's a supernatural element here as well. The effects during the film's finale also weren't too shabby. In general I found 'Death Spa' surprisingly good, and it kept me glued from beginning to end. So many 80's horror movies are in fact horror comedies, but there's no humor here. I rather enjoyed it. Would I watch it again? Yes.

I hadn't heard of this before until it came up in a recommendation on Amazon. Sadly there was a good reason for me not having seen it...it's pretty awful! Story goes something like this...a state-of-the-art health spa suddenly becomes accident prone and it's customers meet with hideous fitness-related accidents and deaths. Seems like the fully automated, computer controlled system is being controlled by a mysterious presence! Who is to blame? Who will be next? Let me spoil this for you...you won't care. Death Spa is hilariously dated, and it shares a similarity with "Evilspeak", which also used computers as a "means of supernatural manifestation", but just raises giggles when viewed today (sadly I presume this future obsolescence was not apparent at the time). Death Spa has forgettable characters (several of whom look the same), confusing motivations, a really silly true culprit, and really bad gore scenes which seem to be attempting the "operatic deaths" of more stylish horror movies of the era (late 80s). The film makers do attempt to gross you out with prosthetic heads and body parts but they just aren't very good...one decapitation scene leaves behind a body that appears to be just a costume draped over a broom. Sadly nothing really works, and even if you forgive the sniggering at the dated 80' computer wizardry, and the cringeworthy 80's fitness fashions, the film still doesn't deliver. I got pretty bored as the running time crawled by..I think you will too.

Witch Bitch… For the (alternative) title alone this movie should be considered a "classic" in the industry of silly-n-cheesy 80's horror! "Death Spa" delivers everything you can derive from the title and cool DVD-cover (mine actually displays a girl's bare ass): rancid sleaze, a retarded plot and loads of gooey make-up effects. Recent widower Michael Evans runs the fancy and hi-tech Starbody Health Spa, where all the gym devices are computer-driven and sexy young girls become a member if only to get close to hunky Michael. Business is great until peculiar 'accidents' begin to take place. Michael's girlfriend Laura is the first victim when she gets heavily burned after using the spa. The next incidents are even worse, resulting in the death of several guests. Michael suspects his brother-in-law to sabotage the place, as he never got over his sister's tragic suicide, but it's more likely that Catherine's vengeful spirit returned from the grave herself. "Death Spa" is wacky nonsense, completely without tension or atmosphere, but the gory murders are tremendously fun to watch! Some of the cheese-highlights include a girl literally blown to pieces by an exploding mirror and another hottie melts down to the bones! An elderly guy (a cop investigating the case) even has his throat bitten open by a deep-frozen fish!!! How many times have you seen that before? Everything in this gym center is bewitched, even the cocktail blender and the bathroom tiles. The dialogs & acting performances are horrible, the typical 80's music is atrocious and all the characters are so dumb they really deserve to die. Ken Foree ('Dawn of the Dead') briefly appears as the gym center's caretaker, but his share in the plot is hardly worth mentioning. "Death Spa" is insignificant and brainless 80's trash, and I enjoyed it A LOT!

Michael Evans (likable William Bumiller) runs a health spa that's beset by a series of gruesome and mysterious deaths. Director Michael Fischa, working from a gleefully ridiculous script by James Bartruff and Mitch Paradise, keeps the enjoyably inane story moving along at a brisk pace, treats the silly premise with gut-busting misguided seriousness, delivers a satisfying smattering of leering gratuitous female nudity, goes delightfully overboard with the excessive explicit splatter, neatly captures the Day-Glo cheesiness of the 80's fitness craze (hot chicks in leotards, leg warmers, strenuous aerobics, and so on), and pulls out the crazy stops at the wild climax in which a Mardi Gras party gets nightmarishly out of hand. Merritt Butrick as arrogant security expert David Avery, Ken Foree as easygoing trainer Marvin, and Rosalind Cash as the no-nonsense Sgt. Stone all do sturdy work in their roles. Moreover, this film further benefits from the smoldering presences of several beautiful babes: Brenda Bakke as Michael's sweet girlfriend Laura Danvers, Alexa Hamilton as conniving backstabbing manager Priscilla Wayne, Shari Shattuck as the vengeful Catherine, and Chelsea Field as perky diver Darla. Peter D. Kaye's shivery synthesizer score hits the shuddery spot. Arledge Armenaki's slick cinematography provides a smooth glossy sheen. A hugely entertaining piece of absolute tosh.

Ah, a lot of trash was released in the eighties, and this is a good example of that. I say 'good example' because, as eighties trash goes; Death Spa actually is quite good! I saw this film under the more appealing title, 'Witch Bitch'; but given the plot, 'Death Spa' seems to make more sense. The film is tongue in cheek throughout, and it's always obvious that things aren't meant to be taken seriously; although that being said, this film is rather gory and that is sure to delight anyone with an inclination to see it! As the title suggests, the film is about several 'accidents' that occur at a local health spa. All of manner of things, from people being ripped apart on a weight lifter to people being scalded alive in a sauna feature, and despite the fact that it's all a little bit silly - the daft plot actually works quite well. Technophobia features in the film too, as it appears that the spa's unique selling point - a computer that runs all the various devices in the building is to blame for the murders. However, the owner of the spa had a girlfriend who apparently committed suicide... For a cheapo eighties flick, the production values aren't bad at all. The central location is well used, and director Michael Fischa delights the audience with a load of shots showing plenty of female flesh. The special effects look cheap, but they're imaginatively used, and the scene where the weight-lifter dies is surprisingly realistic, and actually quite painful to watch. The plot lacks credibility, especially as the health spa continues taking customers after several people have been brutally killed. The acting is rather rubbish overall, and William Bumiller doesn't impress in the lead role. It is nice to see Dawn of the Dead star Ken Foree get a role, however, as the charismatic actor tends to elevate any silly film he stars in. The music is typically eighties, much like the rest of the film and serves only in making the film feel trashier. Death Spa is not as lurid as its alternate title 'Witch Bitch' suggests it is, and there's very little in the way of credibility anywhere in the film. Still, it's a fun time and although I certainly won't be seeing this again; I'm sure eighties horror fans will be pleased.

I have been waiting to find a copy of this movie since I saw a preview for it about 15 years ago. Finally, a few weeks ago I got a copy of the uncut version and I laughed my way through most of this movie. OK, most of the dialogue in this movie is just bad. Not even one of my personal favorite actors (Ken Foree) could save this bad script writing. But hey, this is a movie that takes place in a gym most of the time. How good could the dialogue be? The story line is decent enough to keep interest. Although, things do start to crumble near the end of the movie. But hey, that's OK because the end is the best part of the movie. And I can't forget the gore. This movie is rather graphically violent and I think that's where most of the laughs come in. Mainly, at times the gore takes you by surprise with certain scenes like peoples hands blowing to pieces or throats be impaled through. Yes, this movie is a lot of good fun and if you can stand bad dialogue and extremely bad eights music check it out, if you can find a copy.

I watched the film Deathspa under the title Witchbitch in 1990 and i found it quite enjoyable, It is fairly difficult to find but worth it. The following review contains *Spoilers* This film is not your conventional slasher flick but more of a horror/mystery film that does not take itself too seriously. The story is about a health spa which has been cursed by the spirit of a woman named Catherine who dies shockingly and her husband and brother work there. Unexplainable accidents and even deaths occur in the health spa and while this happens two detectives try to unfold these unexplainable occurrences, could Catherine be responsible for all the mayhem going on at the Starbody Health Spa. We are introduced to at least a couple of dozen characters of various stereotypes including two workers in the club who are con artists, bimbos and vain people that like nothing more than to look good. This film also contains many classic death scenes including a woman who is killed with a food processor!It also has many celebrity cameo appearances from Karyn Parsons who played Hilary in the Fresh Prince Of Bel Air and Brenda Bakke from Demon Knight. Recommended to horror fans who want to watch a film for enjoyment and have some fun 7 out of 10!

I like going to the gym. It's something I would have hated as a geeky kid, being surrounded by people working out, but today, I really find myself looking forward to doing cardio or situps and even lifting weights. I may hate that my gym serves pizza or that so many people text while they should be doing sets, but at least a demonic woman has never taken my gym over and tried to kill everyone. That happens? Well, have you seen Death Spa? Also known as Witch Bitch, this feels like the most 80's movie ever. However, it came out in 1989, which means it feels instantly dated. But hey, Ken Foree (Dawn of the Dead) is in it! Michael Evans owns the titular spa. He's just lost his wife, who had a pregnancy gone wrong and became paraplegic, so she set herself on fire in a field. As you do. Now, she is possessing the Starbody Health Spa. From turning a shower murderous to overloading a computerized Universal style machine to tear a man apart, this is one gym that demands that you spray down the machines and use proper etiquette. There's also a possessed blender and a freezer with murderous fish, which look like no seafood I've ever seen before. If you're coming looking for nudity, this movie is packed with it. Oh the late 80's, when the internet was just a dream and kids found * in the woods and rented movies like this. The film also features Merritt Butrick in his last role. He played Captain Kirk's son in the Star Trek movies and was Richie in Fright Night Part II. And hey! That's Rosalind Cash from The Omega Man as a police officer! There's also a love scene involving asparagus if you're into that.

I was in the mood for some good 80 schlock horror, and I stumbled onto this gem Amazon Prime. Somehow, I'd never seen it before, but I wasn't disappointed. It doesn't get any schlockier or anymore 80s than this. Spandex? Check Gratuitous nudity? Check Aerobics? Check Pastels? Check Smoke machines? Check Melting faces? Check Exploding heads? Check Incredibly lame special effects? Check Seriously, it's got it all. It looks like they had three distinct ideas for how things would play out, and decided to go with all three at the same time, so they all kind of mash together. It's a confusing mess, but who cares. If you're looking for a plot, you're looking in the wrong place. Just relax and enjoy it.