Date Movie

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In an age where cinema is bogged down with lighthearted fare like 12 Years a Slave and The Boy in the Striped Pajamas, comes a refreshingly original exploration of what it means to be one of the feline species. I feel sincerely that the director and writers should be extremely proud of taking on such a difficult topic with such aplomb, to say nothing of the fantastic cast, who breathe rich life into such well rounded characters. But really, the star of this piece is Jinxers. For too long have felines been forced to live in the shadow of their canine cousins. Often portrayed as ruthless, evil creatures hellbent on world domination. Finally, thanks to a shrewd script we witness the true side of the cat world. Intelligence, creativity and sexual prowess. To say that the feline defecation scene exemplifies cinematic art at it's finest would be an understatement. Creatively shot, it carefully depicts the skill and mental ability that cats bring to this world. With deft scripting we are able to witness a side of the feline not previously shown on celluloid. For too long have bigots trodden the cat name into the ground with falsehoods about litter boxes and small piles of faeces in the gardens of fellow neighbours. Finally the truth is revealed. At a time when Oscar nominations are going to such hacks as Robert De Niro, Jinxers executes his role perfectly. With subtle movement and flare he conveys the emotional trauma of cat crappery. People have dared to suggest to me that Jinxers is, in fact, animatronic. How offensive. Such a skilled performance could only be accomplished by such a fine thespian and people should miss his work at their peril. This movie is an unrequited masterpiece and I am appalled that this ever shallow world of low brows and Daniel Day Lewises more people are unable to recognise such fine artistry.

Duffyboy: Good evening ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to the show! Please meet our contestant. Hank! Audience: *Applause* Hank: It's good to be here Duffyboy! Duffyboy: OK, You understand the rules of the game? Hank: Sure thing Duffyboy, fire away! Duffyboy: OK I'll start with a practice question. Question: A magnificent and charming man dedicated solely to sifting through the worst of what the multiplex has to offer. Hank: Who is Duffyboy? Audience: *Applause* Duffyboy: Nice one son! And now it's time to call up the board. What specialist subject will you like to take? Hank: OK I'll start with a £10,000 question. Question: A movie mainly aimed for comedy fans during the Valentines day period. Hank: What is Date Movie? Duffyboy: Correct for £10,000! Audience: *Applause* Hank: OK now I'll move on to £25,000. Question: These two men are in fact directing their debut effort. Hank: Who are Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer? Duffyboy: Well done, here's your £25,000! Hank: And another £25,000 next please. Question: 'When Harry Met Mr. & Mrs. Smith at My Legally Blonde Best Friend's Big Fat Greek Wedding in Sweet Home Alabama, which was Crashed by King Kong, Shallow Hal, Napoleon Dynamite, and Bridget Jones as Hitch discovered What Women Want: How To Say Anything To Lose A Guy In Ten Days whenever they Meet the Parents and Kill Bill. Hank: What is the long scientific expression of Date Movie's title? Duffyboy: Well done you're doing superb! Audience: *Applause* Hank: Right now let's move onto the tough ones. £50,000! Question: It's a series of famous moments from movies that may or may not actually be romantic comedies, and then makes a satire of them as if it were concocted by ten-year olds who had never seen the original pictures. Hank: What is the significant flaw of Date Movie? Duffyboy: Correct, and for a bonus £15,000 Bonus: They ought to be sued for this type of behaviour. Hank: What ought to be done to the directors for ripping off Scary Movie and bastardising it? Duffyboy: Damn you're too freaking good! Hank: Well then, hit me with another £50,000! Question: Bought in to desperately inject some life into this movie. She's trying her best but alas to no avail. Hank: What the hell is Allyson Hannigan doing in this atrocity?! Duffyboy: Sweet! *The show continues until Hank gets to £500,000.* Duffyboy: OK Hank, you've done well so far but this is the big one. If you get this right, you double up to £1m and win this fabulous sports car. If not, you're £500,000 is gone. Do you want to gamble? Hank: How can I possibly lose? I'm going for it! Duffyboy: You are a brave man. Here we go. *The studio turns completely dark as the question is asked* Question: You know what? I have't a clue either. Hank: Errrrrm.....errrrrm......I think it would be.....Why would anyone ever want to watch this? Audience: *graons*. Duffyboy: Awwww bad luck Hank! No. The correct answer is, HOW COULD THESE BASTARDS EVEN F**KING LIVE WITH THEMSELVES AFTER PRODUCING SUCH S**T, NEVER MIND THE FACT THAT THEY ALREADY RIPPED OFF SCARY MOVIE, THEN EXPECTED A PAID F**KING AUDIENCE TO SIT AND BE SATISFIED WITH SUCH B*LLOCKS? Hank: Oops! Duffyboy: Ah well, you get the consolation prize. A DVD copy of Date Movie! Security, show him out! And now a word from our sponsors! Sponsor: Don't watch this film.

I honestly did not know that movies could be this bad. I do not think there is a term to describe every joke falling flat and every thing that might have been even enjoyable (even in a "this is so bad its good" sort of way) going to waste. I expected this movie to suck, but at least in a fun and even a "spot the references" sort of way. By the way, I can't believe they had the gall to spoof KillBill, which is not really even a date movie. O well....at least i have a frame of reference now when describing trash cinema. I can say things like "well that was bad, but at least it wasn't Date Movie." This is not even worth it to see how bad it is, it is an all around unenjoyable movie experience.

A parody of 'Date Movies', this film DATE MOVIE just isn't particularly funny. It tries, it strains, it misses. What laughs there are are far & few in between. If you're a 13 year old boy, you might like it. If you're older than 13, I doubt it. Sophomoric, slap-sticky nonsense. Much of which is highly politically incorrect. Making fun of fat people, beating a homeless person for a laugh, toilet humor. The super smokin' bodies of SOPHIE MONK & CARMEN ELECTRA are the only redeeming highlights. ELECTRA'S bit lasts less than 2 minutes. Looks more like a 'straight to video' or a USA network original movie than a theatrical release. Dreary, stupid & unimaginative.

Date Movie tried to be funny, but it tried too hard and missed the mark by far. The acting was marginal, the spoof-meters too visible, and some of the gags were downright anti-social. I'm not a PC person, but this movie went overboard in trying to offend various groups of people. The plot was simple; some of the scenes were downright gross. So many of the characters were stereotyped, others' characters were too far exaggerated, to the point of being caricatures. It might have worked once, maybe twice, but the writers tried this on a continuous basis, and it became gross-overload. We gave it about half-an hour, then gave up on it. It may have improved after that, but I really doubt it. I recommend this movie to anyone 16 or under; if you are below the age of 16, you will probably love it and laugh all the way through. If you are an adult, however, don't waste your money.

People really need to realize that in order for a parody to be good, it has to be cheesy and in other words, bad. I know it's a paradox, but that is the only genre it is actually applied to. I was surprised to see the average rating of all newer parody stuff on IMDb: Date Movie, Meet the Spartans, Epic Movie, Vampires Suck, etc. They all have 2.something average rating and it's mostly because people are not well informed on the whole concept of this genre. For a parody to be successful, it has to take elements from real life and/or movies/other media that are seemingly serious, but cheesy, little overrated, over the top, inaccurate, ignorant, full of prejudice... etc. So, the good mocking of this just HAS to go a bit further to make the vague inaccuracies more obvious and laughable. I think that this movie succeeded in that. Everything that is bad or over the top is INTENDED to be so, hence, planned and I like it. Alyson Hannigan and Adam Campbell have good chemistry and acting skills and I enjoyed their performances very much. Adam is an underrated actor and he needs more recognition overall. Also, the cast is full of talented parody performers, like Jennifer Coolidge, Eddie Griffin and Tony Cox. For anyone who doesn't particularly find romantic comedies good, and considers them cheesy and overrated, this is the film. It's particular 'victims' are precisely romantic comedies, mostly My Best Friend's Wedding, Meet the Fockers, Wedding Planner, Hitch, Bridget Jones' Diary, My Big Fat Greek Wedding and most wedding films. Alyson Hanigan's character is named Julia Jones, parody of Bridget Jones and Julia Roberts, and Adam Campbell plays Grant Fockyourdaughter, parody of Hugh Grant and Fockers. Sophie Monk's character is parody of Julia Roberts in My Best Friend's Wedding and typical 'bitch' characters, Tony Cox is Hitch, Julia's family is mostly parody of My Big Fat Greek Wedding family with all national prejudice in it. All the characters are hilarious and deliver their puns on time. I was laughing all the time, it's so on spot about all romantic clichés. The moment at the end, with all the most cheesy love declarations ever is my favorite, I can't restrain from laughing hard at that point. Also the films contains Jinxters, the most disgusting cat you just have to LOVE! Let's just mention he doesn't restrain from gerentophilia and necrophilia. His scenes are so disgustingly nauseous, but one of the funniest ever! I will probably never get tired of watching this and I highly recommend it to anyone who loves good laughter and mocking romantic clichés. It's 9/10 in everything it was supposed to be no matter what critic say!

Are you short for cash, Alyson? Is that why your beautifal face had to be seen on screen in this joke of a parody movie? I went to this movie with high expectations. I mean very high. I am a sucker for the parody genre. Ever since The Naked Gun films and Airplane!, Wrongfully Accused, Spy Hard, Scary Movie.. I've been a nut for these types of movies. So why was this one so bad? I can't really explain.. I saw all the movies they parodied, and still.. it just wasn't funny. I am absolutely in love with Alyson Hannigan. She's a very beautifal and very talented actress. Eddie Griffin is one of the funniest comedians to grace the silver screen in years. And please, Lil' Jon is in the movie! What's not to like? Well, the fact that basically, a lot of the parodies were just word for word retellings of some of the movies. The dinner scene was an ENTIRE ripoff of the Meet the Parents scene to a t. This movie tries too hard to be funny, and at sometimes its okay (the Pimp My Ride scene comes to mind), but honestly.. it just tries too hard and doesn't go anywhere. I can't say I was disappointed, it was beyond that. If there's a sequel to this atrocious comedy I'll eat my hat.

This movie was seriously the worst movie I have seen since like ever. I wish I could give it a 0 out of 10. It made no since in how it flowed into a movie, they crammed way too many parodies into a 1 hour and 20 minute movie. Horrible sad excuse of a movie. They could have made this into like 2 or 3 different movies and expanded. making it more original. But every scene was taken from something else. The scenes just made no sense when you watch them all as one movie, they even had movie spoofs of films that came out literally like 6 months ago. Some of the actors did not even seem to have any life to them, they were just there to be fillers. They should have taken more time to make this.To sum up this movie: sad, just a sad poorly done film.

This movie is one of the most horrible experiences of my life. With once having sat through twelve hours of constipation, I have yet to sit through a dump that was more excruciatingly painful than watching this two hour film. The worst part is it isn't even two hours, it's eighty minutes, but it makes you feel like you must have aged four or five years through this. I feel they must have added in Sophie Monk and Carmen Electra not because of their amazing acting talent, but because they felt the humor was so poor they needed to wake people up from this painfully dumb movie. The audience's reaction to the film provided more laughs than the actual movie itself. I can't decide whether I find it comical or depressing that this film managed to parody movie scenes and make them worse. Truly, the people saying these writers aren't talented are wrong, it takes an art to be able to make something this bad. The movie is a complete non sequiter too. In one scene, after the family has toasted at the rehearsal wedding dinner table, Lil' Jon comes in and says, "What? Yeah. Okay." and that's the punch line. Seriously, Hotel Rwanda was funnier than this movie. The film also contains tons of gross out humor, with a man coughing up a hairball, a woman with a hairy back, and a cat humping a corpse. Real clever guys. This is the kind of stuff that makes angels cry, and kills orphan babies. I would've walked out of this monstrosity had it not been for me hoping that maybe, just maybe, it might be slightly enjoyable than the previous torturous minutes. I mean you know something is wrong when the funniest part of a movie is a cat crapping into a toilet. This film is only really a mess of parodies thrown together that don't make any sense. I really have to say it's as witty as it gets when Frodo delivers a swift kick to the nads of Gandolf, and he screams, "My precious!" Finally, the ending seemed to have been thrown in to make an attempt to give the male audience a boner so maybe the wouldn't come out of the theater asking for a gun. No, the worst travesty is not that I spent $6.75 on this movie, but that I will never be the same person I was before. This is the stuff nightmares are made of. Don't go see this under any circumstances. If your significant other wants to see this, fake your death. Anyway you can get out of this movie is truly a blessing. P.S. My cellphone started ringing during the movie. Why, oh why didn't I pick it up? Seriously, man eating on the phone would have been more entertaining than this movie.