Bite Marks

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This was a fun and funny B-rate gem. Don't expect great acting, but there were some good campy moments and fans of B-rate will get a kick out of it. Plus the main characters were gay guys so that's a nice twist.

This campy vampire flick is a train wreck, but is very self-aware of its own ridiculousness. There's plenty of blood, cheesey one-liners, and gratuitous nudity to land this film firmly among other (terrible) slashers from previous decades. Award-winning it is not, but it definitely made me laugh.

The "in-your-face" homosexuality and assorted sex aren't the problem for me. The director/script writer having bad dialogue or a lack of it was. It has a cooler semi-original plot, that does seem to take a backseat to the sexuality. But, half of all movies do that.

A bickering gay couple--Cary (Windham Beacham) and Vogel (David Alanson)--are backpacking across the country. They get tired and hitchhike and are picked up by hunky handsome trucker Brewster (Benjamin Lutz). He's transporting coffins (!!!) to a funeral home. However the truck breaks down near a deserted junkyard, night is falling and it seems the coffins in back have blood thirsty vampires... It starts off OK. Lutz is a good actor and bares his butt briefly. Beacham and Alanson are OK too--and Alanson bares HIS butt. The basic plot is interesting but the film gets more convoluted as it goes on...and stupider. The comedy isn't that good either. If veers from OK to groan worthy and there are some gross out gags that I could have lived without. Still this is not horrible. Lutz and Alanson are VERY attractive, the vampire makeup is effective and there's a hilarious (and ACCURATE) conversation on vampires in films! I laughed out loud when Lutz says, "If you guys talk about "Twilight" I'm throwing you out!" So--all in all--just OK.

Aside from the wimpiest vampires since Twilight, the Bite Marks group at least attempted to make their, ah hem, mark and intertwine what they perceived as comedy, horror *AND* a gay story. Kudos for the effort. Now, that said…This was pretty bad. I got the dark humor, the movie references, that, sadly, were the easiest and least depth ones of the genre and the earnest attempts from the stars to create a low-budget horror with gay characters at the helm vs. the 90%'ers, but it still was unworthy of watching. Trucker #1 gets taken down so his cheatin' brother can take on the shipment/job. Along the way, he picks up a couple and upon reaching their destination, all hell kinda breaks loose when a vampire attacks the now-broken down trailer in a junk yard that UNSURPRISINGLY doesn't have cell reception. While they actually come up with some minute original powers of the vampire and clearly state "this isn't like the movie vampires," they sorely backtrack and include several scenes of the vampire lore found in other movies. But…this movie isn't to be taken seriously, and they shove that down your throat repeatedly. I wish I could recommend this, because I love to support those with $5 in their pockets and decide to make their project come alive on screen. All efforts aside, this is a clunker and hopefully the next gay-themed monster movie with have better writing, funnier dialogue and believable special effects. Oh, and there's a point of "not showing" the gore for either suspense or tension, but to do it because of lack of budget is just embarrassing and so 30 years ago. Skip it.

Another freebie from Youtube. Got sucked into it right away. Pace was quick. Leading 3 actors were young(ish) and cute. Easy to look at them, especially when they are all snuggled(trapped) in the semi's cabin. This was an obvious horror comedy. Dialogue had some funny unexpected surprises. Super cool when the "straight" guy started peeing in one of the vampire's mouths by happenstance. The head chick vampire was quite imposing and determined to get every last one of those "pussies". Happy ending. I found it entertaining.